It's Not A Fashion StatementIt's A Deathwish
by Kat.Bites
Summary: love conquers all...until friends get involved. MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE.
1. prolague

__

**PROLAGUE**

_**LEXI'S POV**_

My name is Lexi, and I'm pretty so get used to it. Yes I'm popular, yes I'm called a prep, but fuck you if you have a problem with it. I have best friends. I have best friend's best friends. I have a boyfriend, and yeah I do cheat on him, but come on; it's fun! He is hot though...Bryce is the star quarterback on the football team, and of course I'm his favorite Cheerleading captain. Anyway, back to MY day and how it's going. Right now I'm at the mall with my best girl Lucy, burning up our father's credit cards. I just picked up the cutest pink mini skirt from Aero, can't believe it was only fifty bucks. I got this super tight white Hollister T-shirt for only like, 30 dollars and it matches the skirt perfectly. Now I just need some sexy sandals to go with it and I'll have a perfect outfit for the last day of school...OH! Steve Madden!

"Lucy, I wanna go in here and get some shoes hun." I said, dragging her by her arm into the store blasting an Ashlee Simpson Song. Immedietly I ran down the isles full of perfect shoes, but none I wanted for my new outfit. I found the sandal section and gasped as a found this perfect pair. They had a woven straw heel that had to be at least four inches, and the straps on the top were pink fabric that tied up the ankle. I looked at the price tag. "Oh my god LUCY!" I shrieked, realizing these shoes were a steal. I wanted my best friend to get them too, but of course with blue straps, because if we had the same shoes I'd have to burn mine. I love Lucy, but I can't have the same shoes as an ugly whore like her. She came running over.  
"What is it Lexi hun?" she asked. I shoved the shoe's price tag in her face and her jaw dropped. "These hot things for only ninety dollars? Oh my fucking God Lexi I'm getting these...but maybe in the green..." her voice trailed off as she bent down, looking for a box with green strapped ones. I was relieved that I didn't have to talk her out of a pink pair, because Lucy can be annoyingly stubborn. I left her to her search and walked to the front of the store, to pay for these, the hottest shoes in the world. As the man rang up the shoes, I kept giving him sex eyes, he was HOT! He pressed a few buttons then spoke to me, without looking up.

"That comes to ninety one twenty five maim" he said. I slid him my credit card across the counter with one finger that ended in a long hot pink fingernail. He still didn't look up, just took the card, swiped it, and handed it back to me with the receipt. He put the shoebox into a bag and handed it to me. "Have a nice day maim." he said.

"I will." I spat, frustrated. "Thank you very much." I added, yanking the bag from his grip with a pout and storming out of the store. "Lucy! Come on!" I squealed. She paid for her shoes as fast as she could while I waited outside the door, arms crossed, tapping my foot. She came running out of the store as fast as she could, and the hot cash register boy had his eyes glued to her ass. What a whore. I mean, she's not even that pretty. She's got short brown hair, maybe to her earlobes, and its frizzy all the time. Lucy, poor girl, has no idea how to do makeup, and her eyeliner is so uneven. She dresses like such a slut too. Right now she was wearing American Eagle jeans that were so low rise you could practically see her ass crack, with a pink Aero t-shirt that barely touched her belly button. Whore. She was wearing adidas flip-flops with rainbow toe socks. Can we say ugly? U-G-L-Y! I mean, think of her, then look at me; blonde hair, perfectly highlighted with brown, coming down to the middle of my back. Perfect beachy waves, falling over the shoulders of my blue Old Navy t-shirt, which matches perfectly with my pale denim capris. Okay I'm wearing adidas sandals too, but at least mine match my outfit! My make up today was light brown liner on both rims, and pink shadow on my lids. Just a little bit of black mascara on my perfect long eyelashes, and a little sheer pink gloss on my lips. Face it, I'm perfect. I mean, Lucy's only popular because she has almost as much money as I do. Some of us, like me, deserve to be blessed the way I am...but some...like Lucy...just don't. It's a shame really, it is. We were walking towards the exit, our shopping done for that day. We were almost out of the mall, but the last store before the exit was the video game depot. There were some boys that I recognized standing outside. Ugh, it's that freaky goth kid, oh man what's his name? I know his last name is Way...um...his first name is something weird...Gerald I think. And all his freaky friends. And his brother. He's such a geeky bulimic stick. They're all goth losers, the bunch of them. But there's this rumor going around the school that the Gerarld (I think) one is like, a vicious blood sucking vampire or something. He looks it too; jet black hair, shoulder length, black eyeliner everywhere, and the palest skin you'll ever see. He dresses in black every day. God he's such a LOSER. Lucy and I got closer to the store and I mumbled to Lucy.

"Just don't look at them. Don't trigger them and the freaks will stay docile." Wow. Docile. I had no clue I knew what that word meant. We reached the storefront and just walked tall right past. The five boys stood there smiling and whistling at us. Vampire Boy's geek bulimic stick brother started catcalling.

"Come on girls back that up." he shouted, one hand cupped around his mouth. The short kid with a blonde Mohawk joined in.

"Boy Mikey I'd sure like a piece of that one. The one in the blue shirt's for me." he said. I stopped and turned around.

"Oh no you didn't." I muttered threateningly. I started walking back towards them, Lucy hurrying after me.

"Lexi come on its not worth it!" she shouted. I stomped right up to the short boy and got right in his face.

"You'd better shut the fuck up." I said. He laughed.

"Or what? You'll smack me over the head with your Hollister bag? Sick your rich daddy on me?" he asked cocking his head to one side, raising an eyebrow and smiling. I narrowed my eyes and gave him my meanest, most threatening look I could make. He just laughed in my face again. "Okay Barbie, off ya go. Go out to your pretty little Mercedes Bentz and drive off. Don't you have a Ken waiting for you somewhere?" he asked. I turned around and walked away. But then I turned again and shouted to him.

"I drive a Land Rover for your information!" I shrieked. I gave them the finger and walked off, Lucy at my heels. My comeback sucked I know, but at least he didn't say anything else to me. What perturbed me was what happened as we were walking away. I heard a voice. I think it was vampire boy's.

"See you later Lucy." he called. I shot a glare at Lucy, who was going a deep shade of crimson. I was disgusted.

"Lucy how do you know that loser?" I asked. She struggled for words.

"Um...He...he's in my...my art class." she said hurriedly.

"Ugh. Well you let me know if he gives you any trouble. I'll get Bryce to kick his ass okay." I said to her. She nodded as we loaded our bags into the trunk of my Land Rover.


	2. Chapter 1

**CHAPTER ONE**

**LUCY'S POV**

"Hey." said Gerard, sneaking up behind me at my pottery wheel. He took me by surprise and I squeaked pathetically and jumped off my stool a little.

"Ugh don't do that!" I muttered as he sat down next to me.

"Well sorry!" he said. He stared intently at me.

"Go away. I shouldn't be talking to you. Lexi would have a fit." I said, staring down at my clay. I couldn't look at him. I liked my social status and he would completely destroy it. I mean, I think Gerard is cool. He and his friends don't care about what everyone else thinks. I wish I had the guts to do that, but it's so much easier with friends like Lexi. If I was seen with Gerard, even talking to him, it'd ruin me forever. He still didn't move. "Ugh, at least pretend to be molding something?" I pleaded. He shrugged and did a spin on his stool to face the wheel next to me. He pushed the foot pedal and started to mold what looked like a bowl. I watched him out of the corner of my eye. He was an incredible sketch artist, but he was also really good with clay, which impressed me, because I'd heard rumors that he's in a band. That's so cool, to be so multi-talented. Wow. Then he spoke.

"So, I just wanted to apologize for the other day at the mall, as soon as I said bye to you I realized Lexi was probably going to tear you apart for me knowing your name." he said. My foot pushed harder on the pedal, nerves kicking in. God I am such a shy little bitch around guys. COME ON LUCY SUCK IT UP!

"Um, no she was just mad at you. Told me to tell her if you ever gave me more trouble." I mumbled. Gerard nodded.

"Well," he started, just wanted to make sure every thing was okay. Is it okay if I say that Lexi Andreas is a bitch?" he asked. I laughed. I totally agreed.

"Um, I want to say yes because its true..." I started. "But she's my best friend." I added. Gerard looked at me, open mouthed, rolled his eyes, shook his head and walked away. He stopped at the door and turned around to face me again.

"Are you always gonna let Lexi run your life?" he asked, clearly disappointed. I wanted to say something, but I was stopped by his words. Because he was right. I really did let Lexi control my every move. I needed to do something, I think this is what they call an epiphany.


	3. Chapter 2

**CHAPTER TWO**

**GERARD'S POV**

I do not like Lucy. I do not like Lucy. I do not like Lucy. I mean, I can't. I mean...she's her and I'm me. She's miss second most popular girl in school, and I'm...wow...what am I? I'm the guy she can't talk to because Lexi and her friends think I'm a freak that's who I am. God why can't I just be normal? You know I'd do that for a girl like Lucy. I could. Hang out with normal kids, dress normal, cut my hair I guess...chill on the eyeliner. But of course I never will. I'm just not a follower. I just wish I could get Lucy to realize that girls like Lexi are just holding her back. I know Lucy isn't happy where she is with Lexi, and Mara, and Jamie, and Terri...and Shauna...and Reese...and Carrie...and Gina...and Haylee...damn that girl's got a lot of friends! But I know she's not happy with any of them. Whenever she's with them she looks so melancholy. I can't stand it. I mean, she could have it so much better...I was interrupted from my thoughts as I arrived at my locker, to see an envelope taped to it. I looked down the hallway to my right, no one there. To my left, no one there. I was a half hour late to school so I wasn't surprised to find no one in the hall with me. I opened the envelope and there seemed to be five cards, along with a letter, written on loose-leaf paper, in perfect handwriting in purple pen. It read

_Gerard, _

_I swear I would be in so much trouble if anyone found out I got you these, but if you've got an invite they won't turn you away. Enclosed are five invitations to Lexi's boyfriend Bryce's end of year blowout on Saturday. You flash these, you're in. I figure you and your friends need a new party to crash. Just make sure you don't tell anyone you got these from me. I snuck them out of Bryce's jacket pocket while he and Lexi were making out against some lockers. _

_P.S._

_Bring that short kid with the blonde Mohawk, Lexi really needs someone to challenge her like he did._

_Lucy_

My Jaw dropped. Lucy had just gotten me, Frank, Ray, Bob, and Mikey into the biggest party of the year. The girl I liked had done this just for me. I smiled as I folded the note up and slid it into the inside pocket of my leather jacket. I pulled the necessary books from my locker and slammed it shut. I walked into my first period class, Chemistry, and slid into my seat in the back, earning a sharp glare from the teacher Ms. Davies. For the remaining fifteen minutes or so I just stared happily at the back of Lucy's head, who was also in the class. Thankfully, Lucy was in six of my classes, not counting lunch. So that was really only ninety minutes in a school day I wasn't within ten feet of her. I know, being in the same room with her doesn't get me any closer to her than any other guy, but it still gives me this unexplainable feeling in the pit of my stomach. I was lost in wonder of what her hair smells like when the bell rang. It made me jump a little too much, and I went crashing off the chair and onto the floor.

"SHIT!" I shouted as my head collided with a lab table. I saw stars and my vision got blurry. I heard laughter, and from what I could see, everyone left in the room was standing there staring at me, the fallen goth boy. Lucy bit her lip. She stared at me, her knees bending and straightening like she wanted to run over and help me, but her gaze kept darting towards Jim Faye, her friend Reese's twin brother. She gave me a pleading look and I rolled my eyes. If Jim saw her help me he'd go tell Reese, who would tell Lexi, and all hell would break lose in poplar girl paradise. I pulled myself up off the floor, holding a lump on the back of my head that was getting bigger by the second. "I'm okay." I said, pushing people away. I grabbed my backpack and walked quickly out of the classroom, towards History, which I was now glad I didn't have with Lucy. That girl needs help.

**LUCY'S POV**

I feel soooooooooooooooooooo bad. Poor Gerard just totally crashed and burned in Chemistry, and I was too much of a fucking chickenshit to help him. Wow. I cannot believe I am that shallow that I would not help a fellow human being, let alone a fellow human being I happen to have a huge crush on, just because my Lexi's friend's twin brother would have seen me. God STUPID LUCY STUPID LUCY! These thoughts wouldn't stop bouncing around my head for the rest of the day. I was so relieved when the final dismissal bell rang and I could just get in my car and go home. But of course, here at my locker I'm being flagged down by Lexi and Gina. Lexi is wearing her outfit she picked out for the last day of school. Whoa, it's the last day of school! I guess I've been thinking about so many other things GERARD that I just couldn't concentrate GERARD on anything GERARD else. See? Kind of like GERARD that.

"Hey, Lucy!" squealed Lexi. "EARTH TO LUCY!" she shouted, pushing my shoulder. I guess I must have spaced thinking about GERARD.

"Oh. Huh? Yeah what?" I said, shaking my head. Lexi rolled her eyes and spoke.

"Anyway, about Bryce's party tomorrow night. My parents are home."

"My parents are home." added Gina.

"And your parents are in Aruba." finished Lexi. Man, when they help each other's sentences like that, its more annoying than you know. Lexi kept talking, of course punctuated by Gina. "So we're getting ready at your house." she said.

"And any boys we meet, we're bringing them back to your place." added Gina.

"And probably spending the night at your place, because if we get drunk, we can't go home. Duh." finished Lexi. NO! I do not want them there when I go home! I want to casually knock into Gerard! LEXI WILL RUIN EVERYTHING! THINK LUCY THINK!  
"Um..." I started. Lucy...where are you going with this??? "We...we can get ready at my place...but my parents are due back at like ten so coming back to my place is probably a bad idea...maybe Mara's parents are gone? I think Terri and Shauna's parents are on a vacation in Baja aren't they?" I started. Lexi's eyes lit up.

"And their house is bigger than yours anyway!" she said excitedly. "Okay, we meet at Terri and Shauna's, and we go back there, except you, you have to be home." she said, giving me a semi-disgusted look. I nodded and Gina finished.

"So, everyone at Shauna's at eight tomorrow night okay? We'll go in separate cars though." she said, looking at me and Lexi. I nodded and they walked away. I breathed a sigh of relief as I walked out of the school. I made a point to go past Gerard's locker. I saw the envelope was gone, so I could only hope that it was taken by him and not someone else ripping it off. I walked outside to my car; I drive a corvette convertible by the way. A red one. It's pretty nice. I walked over and clicked the lock button to open it. As I walked closer, I thought I saw someone's head poking out from the top of the front passenger seat. I started running.  
"HEY! GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY CAR!" I shrieked. The head sat up and turned around to face me. My heart stopped; it was Gerard! He smiled and waved at me. I rolled my eyes and got into MY car next to him. "What the fuck are you doing in my car Gerard? If anyone saw you..." I started.

"I know I know." he said, silencing me. He went into his jacket pocket and handed me the envelope. It was warm from being pressed against his body, and the heat made my fingers tingle. "Wanted to talk to you about these." he said. "Why'd you give them to me?" he asked. I shook my head and opened my mouth, then closed it again. I didn't expect him to confront me about my deed, I just figured he'd show up to the party, have fun, ignore me, well, no not ignore me...yes! ignore me! Ah shit. Yeah, come to the party, have fun, leave. "Lucy?" he asked. Shit, I spaced again.

"Um, yeah." I started. "Well, I mean, you aren't half as bad as Lexi and all my other friends think you are...and...and...I don't know I guess it was just time you got some friendly attention from someone other than your...friends...boys...god what are their names? Those four kids you hang with? Sorry, I don't know them." I said, stupidly. Gerard laughed. "Oh, well the tall skinny one with the glasses is my younger brother Mikey, he's only fifteen. The one with the big orange hair is Ray, the blonde one, kinda short that's Bob, oh and..." he pulled my letter out of the envelope and read a passage. "And...that short kid with the blonde Mohawk...is Frank." he finished. I rolled my eyes. "Alright." I said. Well you bring Mikey, Frank, Ray, and Bob to the party tonight, and maybe you'll catch me without Lexi." I said, smiling and starting my car. Gerard didn't move, so I turned to him. "You want a ride or something?" I asked. Gerard looked at me quizzically, as if to wonder if I'd really just asked him that. "You wanna ride or not?" I asked. Gerard tapped his finger to his chin.

"Hmm." he started. "Frank's van is about to break down, Mikey's got a cold and Ray had the refried beans at lunch." he said. "You have a sweet red corvette, you've got a full tank, and you're in this car." he slammed his head against the seat and stared at the sky for a minute, thinking. he looked at me. "Yeah lets go." he said. I laughed and pushed on the gas.

**GERARD'S POV**

Wow. Shit, I'm in Lucy's car giving her directions to my house. Someone needs to pinch me because I honestly don't believe this is happening.

"Um, take a left here, then straight at the light." I said. I could barely talk I was so nervous. Lucy, this girl sitting next to me, she was perfect. From her toe socks under her adidas, to her Hollister t-shirt. I hated the outfit, but I was sure I loved the girl. There was no way I was going to be able to leave her alone at this party.


	4. Chapter 3

**CHAPTER THREE**

**LEXI'S POV**

I pulled up in front of Shauna and Terri's house, behind Lucy's and Gina's cars. Terri opened the front door and waved to me as I got out and ran with my bag of party clothes, up the walkway to the door. I hugged Terri, which was pretty ritualistic, and walked into the front parlor where everyone else was waiting for me like I was late or something. I looked around the room and was very angry at all of their mad annoyed faces.

"Well?" I said. "Come on! The party's in an hour lets go!" I said. Everyone jumped and grabbed their bags, running into one of the bathrooms. Of course once we were all dressed and examining each other's outfits, I was getting the most compliments. I mean, I did look the best. I had a short denim skirt that barely covered my ass, a white tank top that was very baggy, but with an elastic hem so it hugged me right above my belly button, exposing my piercing. I pierced it because it looks so sexy with my perfect salon tan. My hair was back in a half pony and stick straight. My eyes were covered in hot pink shadow and black eyeliner, and my lips were fire engine red. Slutty? No. Sexy. Of course, I guess I couldn't say the same for the other girls. I mean, they're just not the same...caliber as me. I mean, I love them, but they're just lower than me. We all got into our cars at about ten minutes to nine and drove to Bryce's party. When we pulled up in front of the house there were already silhouettes of crazy party goers in the windows, and the loud music could be heard from the street. There were people standing on the lawn, talking and laughing holding the trademark red plastic cups. I got out of the car and linked arms with Terri and Lucy, with Gina and Shauna on the ends. We walked through the door and the whistles immedietly went off. This may be my boyfriend's party, but me and my girls are the main attraction. Someone came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist. I turned around and kissed Bryce. Please, who else would have dared? He handed me a cup of beer and I swigged as much as I could, and we went upstairs. We were going to make our own party. The girls can find their own fun...

**GERARD'S POV**

"Yeah, Kira, Ray should be here any minute." I said. I was standing outside Bryce's house with Ray's girlfriend Kira. We were just waiting for Frank and Ray. Mikey was already inside, and Bob couldn't make it. I always had this wacky feeling that Kira liked me. She was always laughing at anything I said that resembled a joke, she spent as much time with me alone as possible, and she was always touching my arm. I mean, Kira is great company, and a really good friend, but I just don't see her as someone I would date...especially since she's dating one of my best friends. But okay. We were pretty early for the party, so I was also hoping that we'd gotten there before Lucy, so I could see her at least once, because chances are I won't catch a glimpse of her in that crazy party. Just then Mikey came back outside with drinks for me and Kira.

"Oh, thanks bro." I said, taking the cup and drinking from it. Kira took a sip too.

"No problem Gee. Now if you excuse me, there's a really hot girl in there that I might wanna check out." said Mikey. I rolled my eyes and said.

"Mkay, just make sure you don't hurt her." Mikey punched my shoulder and sprinted back into the house.

"I'm so glad you're here with me Gerard." said Kira. I turned to her and said

"Well, its probably not a good idea to leave you alone out here with all these wild half-drunken guys you know?" I said. She smiled.  
"Aww you're so sweet." she said. Then she put her elbow on my shoulder and rested her head against it. I sighed and rolled my eyes, just letting her stay there like whatever.

**LUCY'S POV**

I was in the bathroom, fixing my makeup, and I looked out the window. OH MY GOD ITS GERARD! I saw his back standing on the lawn. But, who was that next to him? And why was she resting her head on his shoulder...oh no...oh my god...he brought a...oh why didn't I see that coming? Gerard brought a date. I mean, what the hell else could that be? Oh man I feel so stupid. Shit. STUPID LUCY! Okay okay. Ugh. I need a drink. I walked downstairs and into the kitchen. I found the keg and grabbed a red cup, filling it to the brim. I tipped it sideways and let the booze fill my mouth and spill out the sides. I really didn't care if it stained my shirt. I was pissed, and I know I'm a horrible drinker, but I was pissed over Gerard and that girl. I finished my beer and filled the cup again, drinking it faster than the first. Some boys were starting to point me out to their buddies. I'm sure they were telling them that I'm gonna get drunk real fast and someone's gonna be able to take me home. Well, they're probably right. If I can't have Gerard, then I don't care who I sleep with tonight...

**GERARD'S POV**

Ray finally showed up and I escaped from Kira. I went inside, figuring Lucy beat us there. I saw Mikey leaning against the wall in front of some girl who seemed pretty interested in him. GO MIKEY! It's about time that kid got laid. I decided to look around for the keg, seeing as my cup was totally dry. I checked the kitchen and nothing, checked the dining room and nothing, then I heard some cheers and whistles and shouts. All male. Hmm, maybe some girl got drunk and is stripping. I followed the calls into the living room and there was a girl, definitely very drunk, dancing and singing along to the song pumping through the speakers. She had her back to me so I just stood and watched the show. But then she turned around and my eyes got wide. IT WAS LUCY! The song ended and she did a very shaky bow that caused her to fall off the table. A guy caught her who I recognized as the forward on the football team; Byron Nicholas. He started whispering in her ear and my hands balled into fists. He said something to her and she had a very thoughtful look on her face. I was to far away to hear them, but I definitely saw her mouth say one syllable and her head shook. She was saying no and he was still trying to convince her. She started shaking her head harder and firmer, and Byron's brow furrowed. He put his hand around her waist and started to walk. My jaw dropped and my fingernails dug into my palms. He was going to take her even though she didn't want too. She was struggling a little, but poor Lucy had had too much to drink. She kept hitting his chest but he wasn't stopping. I heard her scream and that's when I just could stand there anymore. I walked right over to Byron, and immedietly realized I'd made a mistake. He was at least a foot taller than me and probably twice my weight. Wow Gerard, what the fuck were you thinking. But I didn't stop. I stood right in Byron's path.

"You got a problem little man?" he said. I pushed my shoulders back and spoke.

"Let the girl go Nicholas." I said firmly. He laughed in my face.

"Out of my way kid. Me and my lady friend here have some private business to attend to." he said, trying to go around me.

"I said." I muttered. "Let her go."

"And why the hell would I listen to you?" asked Byron.

"Because..." I started. "Because...she's...she's with me." I shouted. Everyone gasped. I suddenly realized that was one hell of a stupid move. All the poplar crowd were at this party, including all of Lucy's friends, and I just said that she was with me, king of the geeks. I didn't move, but Byron did.

"Look buddy. I don't know what your on, and I don't care if she came with you. She's leaving with me." he said. She's leaving with me. Boy that set me off. I don't know why I did it. I don't even know how I did it. But somehow I managed to send my fist straight into Byron Nicholas's face. People screamed, people jeered. Byron fell to the ground, clutching his face. I wouldn't be surprised if I'd broken his nose. I just saw Lucy fall to the ground. I knelt down next to her limp form. I slapped her face gently.

"LUCY! LUCY WAKE UP! LUCY COME ON!" I shouted. Her eyes fluttered.

"Oh." she said dreamily. "Hey Gerard! How are you! Where am I?" she asked, turning her head. Then she conked out.

"Shit!" I whispered. I picked her up and ran with her out of the house. I situated her over my shoulder and I heard her moan. Well, at least she was awake. I heard her.

"Hey..." she was laughing. "Where are we going?" she asked. I stopped running. Where were we going? I couldn't take her home like this...I guess I'd have to take her home with me. I lowered her gently into the passenger seat of my car and got in the drivers seat. I drove as fast as I could without the cops pulling me over, and we were in front of my house within ten minutes. I glanced at Lucy next to me. She was smiling innocently tracing her finger along the window. It would have been so easy for me to have done whatever I wanted with her right there. I mean, she probably wouldn't even remember if I just ripped off her clothes and...no. No I cant do that because I would remember. And I just couldn't take advantage of Lucy, the girl of my dreams, like that. I pulled the keys out of the ignition and walked around to her side. I lifted her up and brought her inside. Shit...where was I going to put her? I couldn't let her sleep on the couch, because then my parents would see her in the morning. I guess I could put her in my room...in the basement...messy...dirty...cluttered...only one bed...no choice...oh man I guess I'm sleeping with Lucy tonight...I walked downstairs with her over my shoulders. She was basically out cold. I laid her down on my bed and surveyed her. She was wearing a tight halter top that was covered in rhinestones and sequins and she was wearing a gold mini skirt, I don't think I've ever seen one shorter. I could tell she wasn't going to be very comfortable, so I dug through my drawers quietly looking for the biggest t-shirt I had. She was a small girl so it wasn't going to take much. I pulled out an oversize black t-shirt and carefully untied her halter, trying to see as little skin as possible, because I guess I felt bad. I left her bra where it was...if you could call it a bra, there wasn't much to speak for, and slid the shirt over her head, pulling her hair clip out. Once the shirt covered her legs I somehow slid off her skirt, which I folded on a chair with her shirt. I pulled out her earrings and lay them on top of the pile. I surveyed her again, breathing softly into my pillow. I was just glad I'd convinced my parents to let me get a king size bed, because then I'd be sleeping on my floor, which had no carpet. I covered her with a blanket and then took of my jacket and shirt, sliding in next to her, but as far away from her as possible. Don't get me wrong, I was absolutely flying to be in this situation, but I was sure Lucy would have something else to say about it in the morning...


	5. Chapter 4

**CHAPTER FOUR**

**GERARD'S POV**

I woke up the next morning and looked at my alarm clock. It read 8:17. I was dead tired, so I shut my eyes again. As the numbness of sleep wore off, I realized that I had a dead weight on my side. I was laying on my right side, and there was something heavy draped across my left side. I looked down my body and saw a slender arm draped across me. My eyes widened and I rolled over to look at the sleeping Lucy. Only problem was, she wasn't sleeping. Her eyes were wide open and she was looking right at me. Looking right at me and smiling. SMILING! I looked at her quizzically, wondering if she was really holding me, or if she was just to hung over to realize it. She spoke in a froggy whisper.

"I remember pretty much everything that happened last night." she said. "What is your problem?" she asked. My eyebrows furrowed. What did she mean?

"Huh?" I asked.

"Why didn't you just fuck me last night while you had the chance?" she asked. I was very confused.

"You mean you would have wanted me to take you to my house, take advantage of you because you were drunk and wouldn't have been able to fight me off then leave you here?" I asked. She shook her head.

"No. But any other guy would have." she said. "What makes you so special?" she asked. I shrugged.

"Maybe I care." I said. I couldn't believe I was suddenly being so open with her. "Maybe I really care." Gerard, stop now! Don't say anything else! "Maybe I see you as a person and not something I can just use and throw away." GERARD ARE YOU CRAZY! STOP! STOP WHILE YOU STILL CAN! "Maybe I actually love-" THAT'S WHERE YOU STOP! NO! DON'T SAY IT! DON'T SAY IT! And I didn't. The L word slipped out, but I didn't say you. She didn't hear 'I love you' out of my mouth. But damn her, she understood.

"You love me?" she whispered. Shit. I bit my lip. What was I supposed to say? No I don't love you? I wouldn't be able to say that.

"I...I shouldn't have said it. It was dumb...you cant be with a guy like me...I shouldn't have said..." I stumbled over each and every word. She put her finger over my lips and my whole body tingled.

"Say what you feel." she said, staring into my eyes. She moved her finger and let me speak.

"I think I love you Lucy. But I know you don't..." I tried to say. She shook her head and put her finger back on my lips.

"I don't know what I think of you. Honestly, I haven't spent enough time with you to say what I think of you."

"Maybe we can fix that." I said. She didn't say no. She said maybe. And I wanted to just jump right through the roof.

**LUCY'S POV**

I woke up in a strange bed. I tried to remember what had happened last night to make my head hurt so bad. I looked down to survey the damage done to my body, and saw a black t-shirt. This was new. Normally when I got drunk and went home with a guy, I woke up naked. What happened last night? Wait, who am I with?! I rolled over and my jaw dropped, staring at Gerard Way's sleeping form. No way no way no way no way no way. Suddenly, images of the night before flooded my mind. Drinking, then black out. Byron, then black out. Gerard punching Byron, the black out. Gerard's car, then black out. Gerard putting this t-shirt on me, then black out. Oh my god. I spent the night with Gerard and he didn't do a thing to me. Why isn't Gerard Way avaliable in stores to the masses?! You just don't get guys like these anywhere! Without really realizing it, I wrapped my arm around Gerard's middle. It seemed like my arm fit below his ribcage like pieces of a puzzle. Then he stirred. His head moved slightly, and he looked down at my arm. His eyes widened and he looked at me looking at him. There was silence. I wanted to know what he was trying to lure me into by keeping me safe last night.

"I remember everything that happened last night." I said. "What's your problem?" I asked. I of course immedietly regretted that, because I saw his face fall.

"Huh?" he asked. Just say never mind, pretend it never happened. Of course I kept going.

"Why didn't you just fuck me last night while you had the chance?" I asked. I didn't regret saying it, I wanted answers. He spoke and tore apart my defense.

"You mean you would have wanted me to take you to my house, take advantage of you because you were drunk and wouldn't have been able to fight me off then leave you here?" he asked, raising his eyebrows. Ouch. He got me there.

"No." I said. "But any other guy would have. What makes you so special?" I asked. I mean, I had this weird feeling he liked me. What made him such a saint that he wouldn't take me while he had the chance?

"Maybe I care." he said. I couldn't believe he'd said that. "Maybe I really care." This was not happening. He was not saying this. No way. "Maybe I see you as a person and not something I can just use and throw away." Oh shit...this guy in incredible! "Maybe I actually love-" he stopped. Probably because he saw my jaw drop. No. No. No. No. Gerard Way, guy I think I want to be with, did not just say he loved me.

"You love me?" I asked. Shit. I added the "me" and it sounded real. I bit my lip out of nervousness. He began to stutter.

"I...I shouldn't have said it. It was dumb...you cant be with a guy like me...I shouldn't have said..." this was not an answer. I shushed him.

"Say what you feel." I said, moving my finger so he could try to speak again.

"I think I love you Lucy. But I know you don't..." YES! YES I DO! I DO! I DO! I DO LOVE YOU OF COURSE I DO! I had to stop him. I didn't want to hear him say that I didn't love him. But I couldn't say I did. I barely knew him! I couldn't say I loved him, even though I was sure I did. So I may as will milk out a maybe...

"I don't know what I think of you. Honestly, I haven't spent enough time with you to say what I think of you." I said. That works. That's not a no, its not a yes, it's a maybe. Which is good.

"Maybe we can fix that." he said. My heart leapt. He wants to spend time with me. He wants to be with me. I could barely believe that I wasn't dreaming. Then I totally killed the mood.

"Um...you got anything to eat?" I asked. STUPID LUCY! He chuckled a little, then looked at his clock.

"Hmmm my parents are at work...Mikey's just gonna give us the general morning after business...yeah come on lets eat." he said. I stood up and thank god the shirt he gave me to wear was huge, it pretty much reached my knees. He stood up and my heart stopped. OH SHIT. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow! No shirt! Oh man...he was standing right next to me in a pair of jeans, black boxers sticking out the top. But from the waist up he was completely exposed and I thought I was going to have to leave the room to control myself. He walked past me and beckoned me to follow. We walked up the stairs and into his kitchen. Nobody was there, so Gerard spoke. "Hmmm. Let me just run upstairs, Mikey's probably still asleep. I nodded and He took off up another flight of stairs. I looked at the ceiling because I could hear his footsteps above me. I heard his muffled voice.

"Miiiiiiiiiiikkkkkeeeeeeyyyyyy. Oh baby broooooottthhhhheeerrrrrrrrrrr. Where aaaaarrrreeeeee yyyyoooooouuuuuuu." His footsteps got louder as he came down the stairs. "Hmm. No sign of him. Oh well. He's probably out getting something to eat. All we normally have here is shit and coffee." he said. That made me laugh.

"Well, coffee's all I need." I said. Gerard nodded and started up the machine. Within five minutes or so we were sitting at the kitchen table, sipping our coffee silently. My head jerked left at the sound of the door opening. In walked Mikey, wearing the same clothes he had on the night before, his hair incredibly messy, and a huge grin plastered on his face. It got even bigger when he saw me, sitting there in Gerard's t-shirt.

"Well well well." said Mikey. "Gerard how the hell did you get Lucy Dawson home with you?" he asked. "She must have been pretty damn drunk." he said. Not taking his eyes off of me. I gave him a sharp glare. Gerard stopped his brother on his anti-me rampage.

"And you Mr. Stud?" he asked. "Where were you all night?". Gerard put his elbow on the table and rested his chin on his fist. Looking at Mikey with a gaze that said "busted!". Mikey smiled with narrowed eyes.

"Went home with that hot girl from the party." he said. Gerard clapped.

"Nice job Mikey. About time too." he said. Mikey balled up his jacket and threw it at Gerard. It landed on his head, covering his face. Gerard stood up, without removing the jacket. And walked over to Mikey. They started punching and kicking each other, wrestling one another to the ground. After a minute or so, Gerard had won, sitting on top of Mikey and beating his face in, Mikey crying out for mercy. Gerard got up and turned to me. "Want a ride home Luc?" he asked. I nodded and went back into the basement to put my clothes back on. When I emerged, Gerard and Mikey were just sitting there joking and laughing like no fight had just taken place. God it must be so cool to have a sibling. I'm an only child though. Tear tear. Not. Gerard looked up, saw me, and stood up. He extended his arm and, after giving him a "you're pushing it" look, linked elbows with him. He pulled on his jacket and we walked out to the car. As soon as I closed the door the smell of alcohol took over. God did I smell that bad? Thank god Gerard rolled down the windows.

"You know my place is pretty much on the other side of town." I said. He shrugged.

"All the more time we get to spend together." he said, smiling at me. He laughed, I must have blushed a little. I just sat on my hands and stared straight forward, feeling inexplicably guilty. I looked back over my shoulder at Gerard and Mikey's house. It was a nice two level house, white with blue shutters. Just your average suburban house. I suddenly didn't want him to see my house. I mean, it's less of a house, more of a Mansion. Its three levels, and it has a tower. The tower has one room and an attached bathroom, and it's the only fourth level room; my room. I liked the privacy. I didn't want him to see my huge rich person's house, I think it'd make him feel bad. But what could I do? We were already half way there...When we pulled up in front of my house, Gerard was trying to hide his awe. His eyes were wide and he was glancing out the window at every inch of the house. I cleared my throat.

"You...you want to come in?" I asked. Gerard gathered his thoughts.

"Um...no that's okay. I'm supposed to meet the guys at Frank's house for band practice...um..."

"You have a band?" I asked. This was new. He nodded.

"Yeah. You should check us out sometime! We still need a name though." he said. I nodded and said

"Um, I can't today..."

"Okay, well our next practice is next Thursday at Franks. I'll call you and give you the address okay?" he said. I nodded and started to get out of the car. He stopped me. "Of course, I'll need your number." he said.

"Oh, yeah." I said. I opened my purse and pulled out my memo pad and pen, wrote down my number, and handed him the sheet. He took it, apparently trying to come in contact with my hand as much as possible. I walked away from the car, up my walkway and opened my front door, coming into my front parlor. As soon as I shut the door, the phone rang.

"Hello?" I said, answering the phone. Oh joy, it was Lexi.

"OH MY GOD LUCY WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED LAST NIGHT?!" she shrieked into the phone.

"Um...nothing?" I muttered.

"Uh, sweetie, something happened. Everyone is saying they saw you go home with that vampire kid!" she said. Shit. Shit shit shit.

"Oh, Gerard?" I asked. DAMMIT! STUPID MOVE!

"Um...yeah...Gerard." she said, taken aback. "How do you know..." her voice trailed off.

"Um, yeah I got pretty trashed last night Lex...and he saw I was way to drunk to drive so he gave me a ride home. That's all hun, don't worry." I said. I must not have sounded to convincing.

"Um...yeah okay. I need to...I need to go. Bye Luc." she said. She hung up. I started climbing the stairs to my tower. I needed to take a shower, then get some sleep. Some real thinking needed to be done.


	6. Chapter 5

**CHAPTER FIVE**

**LEXI'S POV**

I'm going to the mall. I called Gina instead of Lucy. At this very moment, I was really pissed at Lucy. How could she have been so drunk to accept a ride from that FREAK?! And where did he get the nerve to think he could do that? Ugh. I just, can't deal with Lucy right now.

**GERARD'S POV**

It was Thursday, and Lucy was due here any second to watch our band practice. We were also waiting on Mikey, whose shift at Barns and Noble ended in about ten minutes. Just then, I heard a knock at the garage door. My heart leapt, it had to be Lucy. I opened the door, but it was Frank, holding some cords and an amp. I rolled my eyes and moved so he could get in. Then Lucy came running into the backyard. I smiled, happy to see her. And...shockingly...she wasn't wearing pink...

**LUCY'S POV**

I found the house and ran into the backyard. Gerard was standing in the doorway of the garage, smiling widely, probably at my outfit. As lame as this sounded, I tried to dress goth today. I was wearing a black mini skirt, with a dark blue t-shirt under a black Aero hoodie. I had put on much more eyeliner than normal, and dark blue shadow, topped off with mascara on both top and bottom lashes. I don't know, something in my head wanted to throw him for a loop. I guess one could say I was changing to impress him, but it was preppy clothing, just mixed and matched to look dark. And it appeared to be working. I reached the door and gave him the slightest kiss on the cheek. I don't know what I was trying to do by kissing him, but I did it anyway. And I liked it. I looked at him and he was a deep scarlet. I laughed a little bit at his face and he stared at the ground. Just then, Mikey came running through the door.

"GERARD! FRANK! RAY! BOB! OH MY GOD!" he came stopped only when he crashed into Frank. He was bent double, hands on his knees, breathing heavily. Gerard went hurriedly into Mikey's backpack and ripped out his inhaler and handed it to Mikey. Mikey took a few deep puffs and stood up, wiping his brow.

"Little bro, come on, we gotta practice!" said Gerard. Mikey shook his head.

"Screw practice!" he said, breathing heavily. "We gotta go. Frank's van. Now!" he said. Everyone looked from one person to the other then shrugged, and went out to Frank's van. Mikey took Frank's keys and started the car, everyone buckled in and Mikey wouldn't tell anyone where they were going. After about ten minutes we pulled up in front of a Barns and Noble. Gerard looked at Mikey, one eyebrow raised.

"Mikey...what are we doing here?" he asked. Mikey just got out of the car and started running into the store. Everyone followed him in, then down the stairs into the reading lounge that also had a few extra books. he finally spoke.  
"Okay. I was restocking these shelves, and I saw this." he said, thrusting a book into Frank's hands. Everyone gathered around Frank and looked down at the book cover. It was called "Three Tales of a Chemical Romance." I was confused, what was the point of this? Mikey was excited.  
"It's perfect!" he said, wondering why everyone looked so confused. Then suddenly Ray's head snapped up.

"My. It needs a my." he said. Bob got it too.

"My Chemical Romance?" he said. "My Chemical Romance...My Chemical Romance." everyone said it, trying to get their tongues around the name. I loved it, but what was My Chemical Romance supposed to be? Then it clicked.

"Is that your band name or something?" I asked. A huge maniacal smile broke out across Gerard's face. It spread to Frank, to Mikey, to Bob, and to Ray. They all nodded.

"Yeah." said Gerard. "Yeah Lucy it is." he put his arm around my shoulder. I think he was too excited to realize he probably shouldn't have. But I didn't really mind. I was happy too, I mean, it was a pretty cool name. I liked it.


	7. Chapter 6

**CHAPTER SIX**

**LUCY'S POV**

A few weeks later, maybe three, I was sitting in my room trying to decide what to do with my day, seeing as it was only about eleven o clock, I knew Gerard wouldn't be awake yet. I've been avoiding Lexi and spending a lot of time with Gerard and his friends. Frank has a girlfriend, he says her name is Liz. She seems pretty cool, I want to meet her. I'm going to have my chance soon, seeing as she's coming back from her dad's next week. I decided to take a shower to pass the time between now and noon, which was about the time Gerard normally woke up. I decided to bring my CD player and play it in the bathroom as I showered, seeing as my parents weren't around to annoy. God they're never around. Constantly off on some trip, be it business or vacation. I don't have a problem with it though. They leave me cash and add money to my credit card account every week so I'm fine. I put the mix CD that Gerard made me into my CD player and put the player on the closed toilet seat. I flicked it to track six; "Dancing with Myself" by the Donnas, and walked back into my room to grab my towel. I stripped down and wrapped the towel around my body, walking back into the bathroom. I started the water and hung up my towel. I stepped under the water and shut my eyes. Letting the heat wash over me, the steam making it harder to breathe. I started to do my stupid shower dance to the song, and as terrible as I am, started to sing.

"Oh dancing with myself Oh dancing with myself Well there's nothing to lose And there's nothing to prove When I'm dancing with myself!" Wow I needed to stop. I was embarrassing even though no one was around. I finished washing my hair and shaving my legs and I turned off the water and stepped out of the shower. I bent over and rubbed the towel through my hair. I dried the rest of my body and turned off my CD player. I draped the towel loosely around myself and opened the door. I was still nodding my head to the song, stuck in my head, so my eyes were down, looking at the ground as I walked into my room. I started to take off my towel, but luckily at that exact moment I looked up, and saw Gerard sitting on my bed. I screamed.

"GERARD!" I shrieked. He laughed. "Oh my god you scared the shit out of me!" I said, trying to make my heart slow down. I was so mad at him, he wouldn't stop laughing! I pulled a stuffed animal off my shelf and threw it at his head. He grabbed his head and looked at me with his bottom lip jutting out and giving me the sweetest puppy dog eyes I'd ever seen. I rolled my eyes. "How'd you get in here anyway?" I asked.

"Window." he said plainly. My eyebrows must have become one with my hair. I walked over to my window, it was unlocked. I had one of those windows that was like double doors, and the latch in the middle was currently unlocked. I never locked it, because I'm four stories up. I didn't think I'd ever have to worry about someone breaking in through my window. But apparently, Gerard had managed it. He came up behind me and rested his head on my bare shoulder.

"Um...just fair warning...you should get dressed. This is completely unbearable." he said. I laughed and walked over to my full length mirror. I was paying attention to my face. Spending so much time with Gerard was making me wonder if I could go emo. I mean, if I changed my hairstyle a bit, bought some new clothes...Gerard walked up behind me again. "Whatcha thinking about?" he asked.

"I need a makeover. Maybe a new haircut, new clothes...a piercing...no...I don't do needles really..." I said. Gerard looked at me. Sure you could. Two holes in your ears and one in your lip. That'd be perfect. You know what? Frank's girlfriend Liz comes back today. Um...You get dressed, I need to use the bathroom." he said, walking into the bathroom. What was he thinking? I pulled on a pair of black jeans and a plain yellow t-shirt. I put my hair up in a nubby ponytail, seeing as my hair barely touched my shoulders, and brushed on some black eye shadow and mascara. Wow, being emo in training is much easier than being a preppy girl isn't it? Then I heard Gerard's voice.

"Hey, Ray. Lucy's. one hour." he said. I heard a few beeps and he spoke again. "Bob, Lucy's. one hour." More beeps. What was he up to? "Mikey, Lucy's. One hour." a few more beeps. "Hey Frank. I want you to be at Lucy's in an hour...bring Liz and bring...kit number twelve. Yeah, and some fresh ones. Mkay." another beep. "Hey Liz. Yeah its Gerard. Um, Frank's going to be calling you to bring you to my friend Lucy's house and she's looking into a..." his voice got very quiet and I couldn't hear him anymore. "So bring some of that, and Frank is bringing the kit, yeah you'll be doing four. Okay, see you." he said, one final beep, and he opened the bathroom door.

"What was that all about?" I asked. Nothing. Hope you don't mind the guys are coming over in like an hour. I shrugged.

"That fine." I said. "But what do we do for the next hour?" I asked.

"I don't know." he said. "Wanna watch T.V. or something?" he asked. I walked out my bedroom door with him right behind me, and we walked down the spiraling staircase into the third level. It was "my parents level." It had their bedroom, their bathroom, and some extra rooms I had no clue what they used for. We kept going down the stairs to the second floor, which was where everything was. The ground floor we used as one great big living/dining room for guests. The second floor had our family room, if you could call it that, our kitchen, our dining room, and a main bathroom. We sat down on the couch and Gerard started flicking the channels with the remote. He stopped on some old black and white movie with a lot of screaming and I had no clue what was going on. I don't remember when or why, I just remember falling to the side, my head landing in Gerard's lap, and falling asleep. Suddenly I heard voices.

"Hold her down!" someone hissed. I felt my "pillow" slide out from under me as Gerard stood up and my head thudded against the couch. I didn't want to wake up, so I just let whoever it was roll me onto my back.

"Hold her arms!" someone said. I felt someone pull my arm against the back of the couch, and someone else on the floor hold my arm down.  
"Gerard hold her down!" yet another voice said. That one I recognized as Frank's. I felt someone position themselves on me, straddling my waist. I felt a pair of hands grab the sides of my head, the thumbs resting behind my ears.

"Hey Frankie gimmie a needle." said a female voice. My eyes shot open.  
"NEEDLE!" I shrieked into Gerard's face, which I was surprised to find hanging inches from mine. He was restraining my body and my head at the same time. Mikey was sitting on my shins, Ray was holding my left arm to the couch, and Frank had been sitting on the floor holding my other arm, but now he had rubber gloves on and was handling a needle gun. "GERARD WHAT THE FUCK ARE THEY DOING?!" I shrieked. Gerard winced at the loud sound of my voice.

"Well Luc you said you wanted a piercing. And it just so happens that Liz knows how. So here we go!" he said, smiling a "don't be scared" smile. I took a deep breath. I'm not a girl who likes pain. In fact, I'm petrified of pain. I couldn't stop staring at that damn needle gun that Frank was loading up as Liz was washing her hands. I focused in on Liz for a second. She was pale, skinny, and average height, with long brown hair with bangs that swept over her eye. She wasn't wearing much make up, just black eyeliner and some sheer lip gloss. Her white t-shirt was covered by a black hoodie, and she topped it off with blue jeans that flared out at the bottom, revealing her thong sandals. She dried her hands and walked back into the room.

"Is the subject ready?" she asked, putting on a faux mad scientist accent, I think she was trying to make me feel better. It wasn't working. Frank handed Liz the gun and took my arm again. I couldn't move, between Mikey on my legs, Gerard on my waist and head, and Ray and Frank on my arms, I was completely paralyzed. Liz came close to me and spoke quietly and reassuringly.

"Now Lucy, I'm going to be making five holes today. Two in each ear, and one in your lip. And I'll tell you one thing; its gonna hurt like a bitch." she said.

"Thanks." I said sarcastically, glaring at her.

"Oh come on Lucy Loo." said Gerard, smiling at me. He put his face closer to mine; I could feel his breath on my face. Of course, that made me feel better. I felt Liz's fingers close around my ear, as she marked the spots with a marker. She did the same on the other ear.

"Hey Gee. Does that look even to you?" she asked. Gerard looked at my ears and nodded.

"Pierce away." he said. Liz squeezed my earlobe and positioned the needle above the marker spot. I just stared into Gerard's deep hazel eyes, trying to forget everything except his face. Then I felt it. CLICK PINCH. CLICK PINCH. I shut my eyes tight, but just like that I had two holes in my right ear. I wanted to reach up and touch the newly added jewelry, but Frank was pinning my arm. Liz leaned over me and positioned the gun over my other spots. I wasn't as nervous, I mean it didn't hurt that much. CLICK PINCH. CLICK PINCH. Whoa, two more holes. And now I have pierced ears. Oh shit. SHE'S GOING FOR MY LIP NEXT! She spoke to me again.

"Okay Lucy can you pout for me? Like this?" she said, sticking out her lower lip. I did the same. She grabbed my lip at the right corner and positioned the gun. I felt a pinch, and this one hurt like crazy. My eyes welled up with tears from the squeezing pain. But it was over in a second and I only felt the faintest trickle of blood. I started squirming, trying to get up, but no one would let me, seeing as Liz wanted to make sure she got the special antiseptic on all my new holes. They were burning like crazy, but Liz said that was normal, and should go away within the hour. Well, Frank and Ray let go of my arms, and Mikey had stood up, but for some reason...Gerard wasn't moving. I was losing the circulation to my lower legs.

"Um, Gerard?" I asked.

"Ya Luc." he said, seemingly oblivious to the fact he was still sitting on top of me.

"You wanna get off me now?" I asked. He looked down, then back at my face.

"Well lets think about this. Now I should enjoy this while I can shouldn't I? I mean, how many more times am I going to be in this situation." he said, smiling like a maniac.

"PERV!" I shouted. I couldn't keep from smiling though and he knew it. Thank god Liz came to my rescue.

"Anyone wanna go to Hot Topic or something?" she asked. Gerard rolled right off me and onto the floor.

"LIZ SAID THE MAGIC WORDS! HOT TOPIC! LETS GO!" he said. Jumping up and sliding down the banister of my stairs. Wow. I'd never seen anyone with the balls to do that in a big rich house like mine. Cool.


	8. Chapter 7

**CHAPTER SEVEN**

**FRANK'S POV**

Gerard is a fucking chickenshit. He needs to grow up and kiss Lucy already! I mean god, we're not getting any younger here! Oh well. We're on our way to the mall to, make mischief, chill, screw around, pig out, find clothes for Lucy at Hot Topic, and be general mall rat outcasts. Oh boy this is gonna be great! No that was not sarcasm!

**GERARD'S POV**

We walked into Hot Topic, and Lucy looked almost afraid. She was gazing around, I wondered if she'd ever seen so much black in one store before. I almost laughed, but no, that would have gotten me in a shit load of trouble I knew. We walked through the store, Lucy completely enthralled.

"See anything you like?" I asked. She thought hard.

"The disturbing part is...I love it all." she said. "I think I'm spending too much time with you Gerard." she added, smiling at me. "OOH!" she shrieked suddenly. "This is nice!" she said, rubbing the fabric on a skirt we passed. It was nice. Black denim skirt that fell down to the ankles and had neon green belt loops, snaps, and plastic chains. Her eyes glimmered as she looked at the skirt.  
"You want it?" I asked.

"Hell yeah!" she said.

"You got it. My treat." I said. She looked at me, mouth wide open. Hey Gerard you're on a roll! "In fact...anything and everything you want. I'll front the bill." I said. Stupid move. No way could I afford that. But I wanted to for Lucy. Anything for Lucy. Just then I was nearly knocked over as she gave me a tight hug, lifting her feet off the ground.

"You're the best." she whispered, giving me one final squeeze, then hitting the ground again. She pulled a skirt off the rack in a small, and wandered over to the t-shirt wall. She ended up pulling four t-shirts down, and then got a pair of jeans, that were covered in silver chains. Of course, we got her the trademark black hoodie, and a pair of black chucks. It wasn't much, but it was enough to survive on for now. Liz and the guys met up with us at the front counter as the cashier was ringing up my credit card. He handed Lucy the bag and she kissed me lightly on the cheek. Everyone awwwed.

"Shut up." I said. We walked out of the store, but Liz stopped.

"Hey, guys, wait one sec." she said, staring from Lucy to something in the corner. We all stood waiting outside the store as Liz rung up something she kept hidden from us. She kept looking from Lucy to whatever she had in her hands. She thanked the cashier and came out of the store with a small bag.  
"What was that all about?" said Frank, putting his arm around her as we walked towards the video game store, where we all normally hang out.

**LUCY'S POV**

Gerard is the best. Sweet, good looking, selfless...generally perfect really. I don't know what I'm waiting for, I for some reason just haven't said those three famous last words yet. I love you Gerard. I love you Gerard. It's fine in my head, so why can't I bring myself to say it out loud?! I mean, he buys me everything I want from a store no complaints, and what have I done for him lately? God, I guess he was serious when he said he loved me huh? Wow. We arrived at the game emporium and started flicking through the magazines of new equipment and games. Then I heard it. A high pitched, popular rich girl laugh. Lexi's laugh. My head snapped up from the newest Play station prices to see her standing, not twenty feet away, with Gina, Terri, and Shauna. Oh my god. I started to slowly back up, thinking I could just hide in the store, but I tripped over Ray, who was sitting on the floor, causing me to fall backwards into his lap with a thud, a grunt from Ray, and a scream from me. All eyes were upon me...especially Lexi's. Her jaw dropped as her eyes roamed over who I was with. "SO THIS IS WHO YOU'RE WITH INSTEAD OF AT THE MALL WITH US?" she shrieked. I couldn't move, I couldn't speak. I just stood there, shaking my head. I was caught. I was dead. There was no way I could hide my new friendships anymore. I felt very stupid, just standing there like a piece of wood. Suddenly Gerard came up to me and grabbed my hand.

"Come on. Let's go. Lucy come on!" he said, tugging at my hand. I half walked, half dragged myself behind Gerard; Frank, Mikey, Bob, Ray, and Liz following. I could still hear Lexi shrieking behind me, but I couldn't understand her. I was ready to cry. We all huddled into Frank's van and I collapsed into Gerard's chest, sobbing hysterically. He wrapped his arms around me and rubbed my back. I remember falling asleep, my head full of fear at the phone calls I was going to be getting soon. I woke up in my own bed, alone, to my cell phone ringing on my night stand. I answered it, and without me even saying hello, Lexi and Gina, obviously on speaker phone, started shrieking at me.

"LUCY! WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU? OH MY GOD YOU ARE SO DEAD GIRL! LUCY! LUCY WHAT THE HELL?! LUCY YOU ARE IN SO MUCH TROUBLE-" That was all I could stand. I got so angry I just hung up. A huge smile spread across my face. I just hung up on Lexi Andreas. I just hung up on Lexi Andreas! Oh my god! Power pulsing through my veins...feeling independent! Okay Lucy that's enough. I picked up my cell phone and dialed the number that was now second nature to me.

"Hello?"  
"GERARD YOU'LL NEVER GUESS WHAT I JUST DID!"

"Lucy? Yeah hey what happened?" he asked.

"I HUNG UP ON LEXI!" I shrieked.  
"WHAT? HOW? WHEN DID YOU..." he asked.

"She and Gina called me to bitch about me being at the mall with you guys. They were just screaming, I got pissed, and hung up! Can you believe it Gerard? Can you believe it?" I shrieked into the phone.

"Um...that's great?" he said. I guess he didn't understand the significance of what I'd done.

"Gerard...don't you get it? I can do whatever the hell I want now!" I said, standing up on my bed. He wasn't getting it!

"Oh...okay...that actually is pretty good...I'm...proud of you?" he said. "Oh, by the way, we'll be over in an hour." he added.  
"Wait...for what?" I asked.

"I don't know. Liz says she has an important surprise for you. But she won't tell us what it is." he said. "But we'll be there in an hour. She says to tell you to wear clothes you don't give a shit about."

"Um...okay?" I said. We hung up and I pulled out a scrappy old white t-shirt and some navy blue shorts. I went downstairs and plopped down on the couch to pass the next hour...an hour went by and I heard the doorbell ring. I ran downstairs and opened the front door. In walked Liz and the boys. Liz had the hot topic bag from earlier. "Okay Liz. What is that?" I said, pointing to the bag. She replied by pulling the string, and emptying the contents onto the table. Hair dye. Permanent home kit. With a blue cap. "Is that..." I started, looking at the bottle.

"Blue hair dye." finished Liz, smiling like nothing was crazy about this. I started to sort of shake my head and nod at the same time. As cool as this sounded...did I have the guts? Oh SCREW IT!

"Do it." I said. Liz grabbed me and spun me into the bathroom.

"Sit in the tub." she ordered. "Um, Gerard. Go up to her room and get a...pair of socks or...something." she said. Gerard gave an exaggerated salute and ran upstairs. When he returned he handed Liz a pair of my socks.

"What's that about?" asked Mikey.

"Well we need to blindfold her with something don't we?" said Liz very matter-of-factly. Everyone shrugged and Gerard tied the two socks together, dying them around my eyes, under my hair. I completely blacked out and just rested my back against the wall of the tub. Liz put a towel around my shoulders then spoke to me.

"Oh and Lucy; I'm gonna be doing some cutting, not too much, just to shape okay?" she said.

"Um...okay? Nothing to drastic though..." I said. She just shushed me.

"Okay." she said. "Frank, crack open the dye, Ray get me some tin foil, Gerard open the brush packages in the bag, and someone hand me some gloves." she ordered. I heard her snap some rubber gloves on her hands and she spoke to everyone in the room. "By the way guys, this stuff is gonna smell like SHIT." she said. She started putting strands of my hair over tin foil and brushing the dye in .Every now and then I would hear a SNIP and some hair would fall off my head. "Okay, well the dye is in...we just have to let it set for about twenty minutes..." she said.

"And what am I supposed to do blindfolded in a bathtub for twenty minutes?" I asked. I heard Ray respond.

"Well I'm sure Gerard has some ideas on that one Lucy." he said. I couldn't see him, but I could tell he was cracking up. "OW!" he shouted as I heard a loud thud. I assumed it was Gerard's fist colliding with Ray's arm. We all ended up just talking about the school year that started in a little less than a week. I was of course nervous as hell at what I was going to face with Lexi and the girls, but maybe having Gerard, Liz, and the guys will make it a little easier...but then again I'm probably wrong. Finally Liz started to pull the foil out of my hair.

"Lucy. Get out of the tub." she said. I knelt down on the floor, Liz bending over me and we washed my hair, washing out the excess dye. Once it was done, she wrapped my hair in a towel and went to get the hair dryer. She turned me away from the mirror and took the towel off my head, turning on the hair dryer. She styled my hair meticulously and then muttered to Frank.

"Frankie baby, go up to Lucy's room and find her make up bag. I know she has one somewhere." Frank went off up the stairs and returned not five minutes later with my little blue makeup bag. Liz finished my hair with some fixing spray and grabbed my makeup bag, digging for my eyeliner. Her hand emerged from the bag clutching my black eye pencil. She was about to start putting it on my eyes, but then looked at the boys. "Out." she said. They all groaned. "Come on guys you get to be surprised too!" she said. They all rolled there eyes and went downstairs. Lucy made a thick black line on both my top lids, and lined the bottom rims with liner too. She added mascara and once that dried she coated my eyelids with dark blue shadow. She then pulled out some dark pink blush and for some reason rubbed that in circles underneath my eyes like eye shadow. "Had to use blush. You don't have this color in eye shadow. We'll have to work on that." she said. She was about to go back into my bag for lipstick, but then she said "No way you'll have that." she bit her lip, thinking. Then she turned to her own bag and pulled out a lipstick. "Knew I had it with me." she said smiling. It was black lipstick. I was going to look dead! She coated my lips a few times with the black lipstick and then said "VIOLA!" standing back to admire her handiwork. Then she moved some part of my hair so that it covered my eye, and then nodded. "Done. Perfect." she said. "You can look." I braced myself, and turned to the big mirror. Oh. My. God. My hair was much shorter, almost like a boy's haircut and it was combed over so that it covered my left eye in one smooth triangle. My hair was streaked in deep blue, perfect thin strands among my dark brown hair. My eyes were dark with blue, and the pink underneath was a great touch. And the lipstick didn't look half bad with my lip ring. And I looked positively goth with my chain jeans and black hoodie. A sudden unexplainable excitement filled me and traveled from my stomach, to my legs, to my arms, to my head and I smiled at Liz.

"I LOVE IT!" I shrieked, hugging her. I went closer to the mirror and examined my hair closer. Liz opened the door and called the guys back in. Frank was the first one in the room. When he saw me his jaw just dropped for a second then he shouted.  
"HOLY FUCK!" he shouted, staring at me dumbfounded. "Liz, honey you're a genius." he said wrapping his arm around her. Ray, Bob, and Mikey came in next and fell over each other when they saw me.  
"Jesus..." said Ray.

"Fucking..." said Bob.

"CHRIST!" said Mikey. I started laughing like crazy. Their faces were the priceless part of a MasterCard commercial. I just gave them a huge smile, and Gerard walked into the room. He was looking down at the guys.  
"What's up does she look that terrible?" he asked. He looked up and froze. His eyes got wide and his mouth was hanging open. He struggled for words as I smiled, admiring all the new attention.

**GERARD'S POV**

God I hope Liz doesn't screw Lucy's head up. I walked back up the stairs behind Mikey, almost dreading this. I liked Lucy the way she looked now, preppy as that is...and I may not like this new Lucy...I heard Frank yell and I walked a little faster. I heard Ray, Bob, and Mikey going crazy and I knew it had come out badly. I looked in at Ray, Bob, and Mikey, who had fallen over each other on the floor. I tried to make a joke.

"What, does she look that terrible?" I asked. Mikey nodded towards her. I gulped and looked up. Oh. My. God. She looked incredible. Liz did a great job. Blue streaks, black blue and pink eyes, and black lips. Oh wow...this is definitely a good thing. And by the look on Lucy's face she thought so too. I was so happy, not just because she was prettier than ever, but because she was happy. I only hoped that this new look gave her confidence for the new school year...


	9. Chapter 8

**CHAPTER EIGHT**

**LUCY'S POV**

I am not afraid of the first day of school. I am not afraid of the first day of school. I AM NOT AFRAID OF THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL! I've never been afraid of school, and senior year is not a good place to start! I was getting ready for...gulp...the first day of school, Frank was picking me up along with everyone else in his big white van. We were all going to school together. I was just combing my hair over my eye when Frank honked the horn outside. I grabbed my Iron Maiden hoodie and my backpack and ran down the stairs and out the door. Gerard opened the side sliding door for me and I jumped into the van.

"Nervous?" he asked.

"Me? Nervous? No...why do you say that?" I asked.

"Because your nails are bitten down way too far, your biting your lip so hard its about to split open, and you're sweating like a pig." said Frank. Gerard glared at him.

"I was GOING to say that, I mean being seen with us...and your new wardrobe...gonna be a shocker isn't it? I mean, Lucy Dawson walking against the wind with the freaks and the outcasts?" said Gerard. I smiled and leaned against him.

"Lets just pretend there is no Lexi." I said. Gerard wrapped his arms around me.

"Best thing I've EVER heard out of your mouth." he said. We all sat in silence until we pulled into the parking lot of the familiar huge brick building known as Belleville High. I took a deep breath, grabbed my bag, and got out of the van behind Gerard. People stopped and stared as we walked, some whispering, some pointing, some were even laughing. I just subtly grabbed Gerard's hand and squeezed it tight. He squeezed it back, realizing I needed comfort. I heard voices.  
"Wait is that Lucy Dawson?"

"Isn't that Lexi's friend?"

"What's wrong with her face?"

"And her clothes...eww."

"She's kinda hot." These voices echoed all around me as I walked, hand in hand with Gerard into the main office so we could all get our schedules. I wonder how this happened, we all had every single class together; Me, Gerard, Frank, Liz, Mikey, Ray, and Bob had each and every single class together. Who would have thought. Just then I heard a shout behind me. Lexi.

"LUCY!" she shouted, coming up behind me. I spun around and she gave my hair, makeup, and clothes a look of pure disgust. "We NEED to talk. Now." she said, looking at the guys and Liz.

"You can talk to me right here." I said. She sighed indignantly.  
"What are you doing Lucy?" she asked. I just shook my head. "Are you doing this for attention? Are you trying to get guys or something? Because its not working! You're just an embarrassment to yourself and this school." she said, breathing hard. I couldn't say anything. I was sure that if I opened my mouth I would start sobbing, or apologizing. And I knew that neither one of those was an option. "What is this Lucy? Some kind of fashion statement?" she asked. "Huh? Huh? Answer me Lucy!" she shrieked.  
"No." I whispered. "It's no fashion statement it's not..." I broke off, my voice cracking as tears leaked down my face. Lexi got right in my face and whispered menacingly in my ear.

"Well then it must be your deathwish. Because you just committed social suicide." she whispered. She bumped her shoulder into mine, throwing me back, and walked off. I couldn't hold the tears in any longer. I let out an agonizing sob and ran for the nearest girl's bathroom. Liz ran after me.  
"LUCY! LUCY COME BACK! LUCY HUN!" she shouted. I didn't stop. I just ran into the bathroom and slid into the big handicapped stall. I slid the lock closed and sat on the floor in the corner. I hugged my knees up to my chest and just cried. I heard the door open and close again, and footsteps walk, stopping right in front of the door to my stall. "Lucy?" whispered Liz. "Are you okay?" she asked.

"Go away." I whined. She pushed on the stall door.  
"Lucy let me in." she said.

"No. Just go away." I pleaded. She then lay stomach-down on the floor and slid under the door. "God damn you." I muttered. She slid against the wall next to me.

"Lucy...Lexi's a bitch and everyone knows it. You can't let her do this to you." she said gently. "I know getting beaten down like that hurts, but you gotta be strong hun." she stood up and extended her hand. "Come on. We have classes." she said. I shook my head.

"I'm staying here." I said. "I don't want anyone to see me." I said.

"Lucy!" she said. "Don't feel bad about the way you look just because some people think its weird! Do you like it?" she asked.

"I...did...no I do." I said.

"Then that's all that matters. Now come on. School time." she said standing up again.

"Liz...I appreciate it but...I think I'm going to go home." I said, taking her arm and letting her pull me up. She rolled her eyes.

"Alright, but at least let me drive you. I have a copy of Frank's car keys." she said.

"Thanks." I said, picking up my backpack. We walked out of a smaller exit to the school and into the parking lot. Liz started Frank's van and we drove back to my house. When we got there Liz spoke.

"Okay Lucy I'm going back to school. You...get some sleep. Might be good for you." I nodded and started to get out of the car. "Oh, and one more thing!" she said. I turned. "Call Gerard when school lets out. Let him know you're okay. He's going to be worried about you all day. He's over the fucking moon for you Lucy." she said. I nodded.

"I know."

"And you're into him. I know that for a fact." she added.

"Is it that obvious?" I asked. She laughed.

"It's WAY more than that obvious hun." she said. "Call him okay?" she said again. I nodded and she drove off. I opened my front door and ran upstairs as fast as I could. I quickly changed my clothes; white tank top and black basketball shorts. My makeup was already ruined so I didn't care at all when I cried hysterically into my pillow. I pretended that she did, but Liz hadn't made me feel any better. I felt ugly, stupid, embarrassing, and burdensome. I just remember falling asleep through tear blurred eyes, looking at the clock, with only seven hours until I had to call Gerard...Someone was tapping at my window. Someone was opening my window. Someone was climbing into my room. It was Gerard I was sure. I wasn't too worried anyway, considering the fact that I wasn't really awake. I could hear the sounds, but my eyes were shut and I wasn't really processing the fact that Gerard had just come and sat down on my bed. He sat down right in front of me, back resting against my stomach; I was laying on my side. He started to speak, but I kept my eyes shut.

"Hey Lucy? You asleep?" he whispered. I kept my eyes shut. If I was awake, I had no idea what I was going to say to him, so I kept 'sleeping' and he kept talking. "I am...so sorry." he started. What? What was he sorry for? "I...this is all my fault Lucy." he sounded like he was going to cry. "If I wasn't so obsessed...with getting you to like me...God. I was so focused on getting you into me and my world, that I completely forgot about you and your world. I completely disregarded what it would do to you. Wow. I completely disregard your feelings in exchange for my own, and then I turn around and say I love you? What's the fucking matter with me Lucy?" he asked. He inhaled sharply and the bed started to shake slightly as he sobbed. I opened my eyes just the tiniest crack so I could just see his figure through my eyelashes. He had his face buried in his hands and he was unmistakably crying. I had never seen a guy cry before. I'd never heard a guy be so honest and open with a girl, even if she was 'sleeping'. I wasn't sure what made me do it, I'm not even sure I remember deciding to do it, but before he could even realize it, I had sat up, pulled his face out of his hands, and kissed him hard. Once the initial shock had worn off, he started to kiss me back. I'll be honest here, I get drunk sometimes to let go. I normally end up going home with, and fucking some random guy who picks me up at the party I'm drinking at. Gerard...wow. Honestly I'd never kissed anyone like this without any booze in my system. What was wrong with me? Whoa...whoa...I'm falling back on the bed...and he didn't push me down? I went down...by myself? Lucy...what are you doing...think about this...WAIT. Think about what? I love Gerard and at this moment...well...whatever happens happens. Gerard was fully on top of me and we were just kissing away just like no one else in the world mattered. He kissed my cheek, and down my neck. My neck became my chest and he just kept going, farther and farther down. As conceited as this might sound; he seemed totally lost in me. I mean, I think this was something he'd been wanting since he first laid eyes on me. So why not now? I mean, he wants me, I want him, perfect right? Apparently not because he stopped. He stopped right where my skin became my tank top and looked up at my face. I could see in his eyes that he wasn't sure of himself. He spoke in a barely audible whisper. "Um...shit. Honestly...I have no clue what I'm doing." Wait...was he saying he was a...no...was he? "I've just...I've never done this before and...". Wow. Wow he IS isn't he? Weird. I didn't know any seniors on the planet were virgins. Interesting. His honesty was striking. What he said next made me laugh. "I understand if you don't wanna...well...I mean if you want someone with more...experience." I ran my fingers through his hair.

"No." I said, smiling at him, his chin resting on my chest. "I don't need experience...I don't need skill...I need Gerard Way." I said. A smile spread across his face.

"Hah...okay then." he said. He sat up for a second and pulled his wallet out of his pocket. "SHIT." he growled. "Frank bugs me about being prepared and the ONE TIME I don't have the damn thing on me is the one time I need it." he was muttering to himself. He looked at me. "Um...sorry I don't have a...a..."

"A condom?" I finished.

"Yeah...a...one of those." he said, looking very embarrassed. He was bright red up to the tips of his ears. Damn. No condom pretty much means no deal these days. But wait...maybe...NO. Lucy don't even think that. You can't do that. It goes against everything your teachers taught you, everything your parents taught you, everything you know is right! Don't do it Lucy! Wow, he's got really nice eyes...and a cute little nose...wow...I'm gonna do this...

"Screw the damn condom." I whispered, grabbing a bunch of his shirt and pulling him back down over me. He did exactly what he'd done before, kissing his way down, only this time, when he reached my tank top, he just pulled it off. I went for the button his jeans and got them off. He got my shorts off and I got his shirt. I pried his boxers off and that's when I knew it. What I'd been wondering since that morning after the party. I knew it. I knew my answer. And I was especially sure of this once he started to...okay well...I think you get it right? Yeah thought so. All I'll say is that I think he was bullshitting me about being virgin. He was way to good for it to have been his first time. But then again...maybe that's just another thing we can add to the list of Gerard Way's Special Talents... "Wow." I said when it was over. I was just laying on my side, one hand propping up my head, the other draped across the blanket covering us. Gerard was just staring at me with the most benign smile on his face. "What?" I asked him. He shook his head.

"Nothing." he said. "You're just...perfect in every way, that's all." He looked at my hand that was resting on my hip, and traced his index finger up each of my fingers. He ran two or three fingers up my arm, stopping to make a little circle around every freckle he saw. It ticked, and I got goose bumps as his hand ran up my shoulder, up my neck, and across my cheek. He outlined my eyes, slid down my nose and then just contented himself running his finger along my bottom lip over and over again. I took his hand and pulled him closer to me, so I could kiss him again. Oh yeah, I loved him alright. For sure. I rested my chin in the crook of his neck so my head basically rested on his. I have no idea what the point of this was, but it brought me closer to him, so I didn't care, and neither did he. Say it Lucy say it. Come on Lucy just say it! Come on Lucy get some guts and tell him how you feel! Okay. Right now, here we go. I can say it now. NOW!

"Gerard..."

**GERARD'S POV**

Lucy is perfect. I am so in love with her I want to just scream it all day. I never want to let her out of my sight. I want to be the first one she sees in the morning, and the last one she sees at night. Of course, it seems that tonight I'll be the last one she sees. Wow. I can't believe me and Lucy are actually lying together after having...just...wow. I just wanted to touch her. I traced her fingers and her arm, then her face. I just started tracing her lip. Then she kissed me. She moved in so our heads were one on the other and she spoke.  
"Gerard..."

"Hmm?" I asked dreamily.

"I love you." she said. My heart stopped and my eyes got wide.

"Huh?" I said. Did she really just say...? No...No way did she just say...

"I love you." she repeated, clearer and with more confidence this time. I moved away from her a few inches to take in her whole face, making sure she wasn't smiling a "you're on candid camera" smile. She wasn't smiling at all though. She was dead serious. I made the stupid move of asking

"R...really?" I asked. Shit. Stupid Gerard. She nodded smiling now.

"I know now. I do. I love you Gerard." she said. I don't think my heart was beating, and if it was, it was beating so fast that I couldn't feel or hear it anymore. But just then, three honks were heard from very very close to the house. Lucy's eyes got wide. "Oh...My...God..." she said. She leapt out of bed and cracked open the curtains on one of her windows. "MY PARENTS! THEY'RE BACK!" she said. Oh no. Not good. Parents. She started fanning herself and breathing hard, thinking quickly. She glanced all over her room, tongue between her teeth. "Um...CLOSET!" she said. She grabbed my clothes and threw them into the closet and I ran in after them. This girl had a damn big closet. At least ten by ten square feet. DAMN! Lucy has a lot of clothes. She called to me through the door. "Okay. I'm locking it from the outside, but take as many clothes as you need too off the hangers and hide yourself in the pile okay?"

"Yeah okay." I said, pulling my jeans back on. I didn't mind what Lucy was doing, I mean, I had no desire to be parent chow, what I was mad about was the fact that we got interrupted in the first place. But Lucy's parents are rarely home for longer than five days at a time. Lucy shut herself in the bathroom and I heard the shower running. No parents came up and knocked, but I could hear them on the floor below, so I didn't dare make a sound. Lucy's shower ended and I heard her step into her room. She must have put on whatever she was wearing before she changed into what I saw her in...for that short time. Wow, this memory is going to stick. Lucy knocked on the closet door.

"Gerard. Come on. We're making a break for it." she whispered, opening the door. I walked out on tiptoe. She'd put on her jeans with the silver chains, a Green Day t-shirt, and her black hoodie. She'd re-done her makeup and was tying her black chucks. "My parents will tear me to shreds if they see me like this. We're going out the window and you're going to teach me how." she said. I smiled.

"Woo you're such a rebel Luc." I said. Shut up she said, pushing my chest playfully. I fell backwards over a chair and made one hell of a sound. "SHIT." I hissed. She opened the window and I climbed down. the top tower was made of uneven bricks, perfect hand and foot holds basically. I climbed down them like a ladder and started coaching Lucy.

"Okay hun a little further down on your left...okay now bring your right foot down...great." I said as she landed next to me on the roof. I kissed her once and began to descend the drainpipe. I made it all the way to the ground unscathed, but Lucy was leaning over the roof in fear.

"No WAY." she said.

"Come on baby it's okay! It's just like those pole things at playgrounds you know? Just three stories tall." I said, laughing a little.

"Ugh. You are not helpful and you are so catching me!" she hissed.

"Of course I'll catch you babe." I said, holding out my arms. She latched onto the drainpipe and started to push slowly downward. About two stories down, almost at the bottom, she lost her grip on the pipe. She screamed quickly and thumped down into my arms. I laughed as she lay there in my arms, breathing heavily from the fear.

"Not funny Gee. Not funny at ALL." she said. I gently tilted her down so she stood, and we crept to the backyard, where the garage was. She pulled the door open and we went inside, sitting in her corvette. She started it up and pushed the petal down as far as it would go, throwing me backwards in my seat. When we were a few blocks away, she slowed down. "So where too baby?" she asked, turning to me. I thought for a second, then remembered the news I heard that day at school.

"It's Wednesday right?" I asked. Lucy nodded.

"What time is it?" I asked.

"Um..." Lucy glanced at her watch. "About eight thirty. Why?"

"Hang a left here." I said, pointing to a side street. "I heard in school today where there's a rave tonight.


	10. Chapter 9

**CHAPTER NINE**

**LEXI'S POV**

"Gina this rave tonight is just what I need to get my mind off of Lucy and those freaks." I said as Gina straightened my hair. We were all going to a rave in Newark, and when I say all, I mean Me, Bryce, Gina, Terri, and Shauna; basically everyone except LUCY. God. Didn't I say she was a whore? And she's uglier now than she ever was. That damn lip ring, and that hair! Oh my god! And where the hell did she learn to do her make up? Clown School? I'm going to show that bitch what happens when she tries to ditch Lexi Andreas. I made sure Bryce's cousin Tomás told that Gerard kid about the rave tonight. I knew he would bring Lucy, and maybe if I'm lucky we can even take down all his little freak friends. Yeah, I know that makes it sound like we hired a hit man or something, but no such luck. We're taking matters into our own hands. I got Tomás on the phone.

"Is your costume ready?" I asked.

"Yes Lexi. This is pretty damn easy." said Tomás in his heavy Spanish accent.

"Perfect." I said. "And...maybe after the rave...we can hook up." I added. What? Tomás is HOT!

**GERARD'S POV**

I can't think of a time in my life that I've ever been happier. Lucy and I are in love, and that's all I really need. And now I'm going to a party with her. Okay, a rave but still, those are fun. This guy named Tomás told me about it during Bio today, nice guy that Tomás. So Lucy and I were driving in her corvette, on the way to Newark for this party, that, according to Tomás of course, was supposed to be a night no one was going to ever forget. Hmm, sounds like lots of music, booze, sex, and some drugs. Awesome! We passed the "NOW ENTERING NEWARK" sign and I continued giving Lucy further directions. We pulled up in front of a huge dingy warehouse with music pumping out through the windows, making the pavement shake as our feet hit the street. I took Lucy's hand and we went inside.

**LEXI'S POV**

I saw Lucy and Gerard come into the party and I signaled to Tomás that they were here. He gave me the thumbs up and tripped a girl walking past him. She shrieked, tripped, and spilled her drink...all over Lucy's shirt. Lucy jumped back as the beer hit her pink t-shirt and she shook the liquid off her hands. Step one: complete. Haha. Tomás came rushing forward, trying to tend to Lucy. He led her to the ladies room, and she told Gerard to stay where he was. It was a small bathroom, so Tomás offered to hold her bag. She accepted. YES! Step two: complete. This was going perfectly! Lucy locked the door to the bathroom and Tomás beckoned me over. I watched as he slipped the Ziploc bag into Lucy's little backpack. We smiled at each other, and I ran when the doorknob started to turn again. Lucy thanked Tomás and took her purse back. We watched her and Gerard dance for about an hour, then I pulled out my cell phone and headed for the soundproof lounge. I dialed three numbers.

"Hello? Yes I'd like to report a loud rowdy party. Yes I saw multiple minors go in. I assume there is alcohol yes. Okay. You're welcome. Bye bye now." I hung up. Of course I'd called the police. I walked outside and waited. As soon as heard the sirens, I ran in quickly and told the DJ that the cops has come to bust us. He cut the music and announced the cops over the loudspeaker. Everyone screamed, threw their drinks and started running. I saw Gerard and Lucy among those going towards the back door. Again, perfect. I ran to the back door, and pretended to knock into Lucy by mistake. We both hit the floor, and her backpack opened, the contents flying everywhere. The cops had surrounded the whole building, and there were a few troopers standing right outside the door as the contents of Lucy's bag landed at his feet...including the Ziploc bag...full of six hundred dollars worth of cocaine. Yes. That's what Tomás slipped her. That was the grand plan...

**GERARD'S POV**

"Okay ladies and gentlemen. We've just got word that the coppers are on their way now. I recommend you all drop your substances and go!" shouted the DJ over the loudspeaker No one wasted any time. Booze started flying everywhere as people started charging towards the exits. Of course Lucy and I realized there was no chance of getting out the front, too many people were already being trampled down. I spotted a back exit and only a few other people seemed to see it. We ran towards it and I saw Lexi Andreas running too. She and Lucy collided and fell to the ground, the contents of Lucy's bag flying everywhere. Then the door opened. There were police standing there, looking at what Lucy had in her bag. That's when I saw it: the drugs. The thick white powder, hundreds of dollars worth. Oh my God...in LUCY'S BAG?! One of the officers picked up the bag and said

"Miss, come with me please." Oh my god. Lucy looked terrified and confused. Suddenly it hit me: those weren't Lucy's drugs. She looked too confused, and she wasn't that kind of girl anyway. Someone had put that cocaine in there. I grabbed Lucy's hand.

"NO!" I shouted. "ITS NOT HERS! STOP! NO!" I didn't know what I was going to accomplish, and then I got in deep shit too.

"Son please let go of the girl she's coming down town." said the officer dragging Lucy.

"NO!" I shouted. "ITS NOT HERS! Its...its...its mine!" What? What did I just say? Another cop grabbed me and shoved me with Lucy into the back of one of the patrol cars. Once the car started moving, Lucy slid closer to me, and turned her back to me to try to grab my hand, seeing as we were in handcuffs. She rested the back of her head on my shoulder.

"Gerard why did you tell them it was yours?" she asked pleadingly.

"More importantly, how did that shit get into your bag?" I asked. She shook her head.

"I know you'll believe me when I say I have no clue. But no one else is going to believe me. I've never done drugs. I don't WANT to do drugs. I don't know how the hell that crack got into my bag. But you didn't have to go do that." she said sadly. "Now you're in as much trouble as I am." she said. My heart sank; she was right. We were both at least spending tonight in jail. I started thinking about my one phone call. I couldn't call my parents. Maybe Frank? No, what would he tell his mom when he tried to leave the house at 12:30? I could try Mikey...yeah Mikey. That works. Then I remembered my parents weren't home anyway. I decided on Mikey just as we pulled up into the lot of the station. They pulled Lucy and I out of the car and brought us downstairs to a desk with ink and fingerprint sheets. The lady behind the desk explained to us what she was going to do.

"We're going to take your fingerprints, then test the drugs. If your prints aren't on them, you will be released unless we can find other proof they belong to you." she said. They unlocked mine and Lucy's handcuffs and the lady printed Lucy. Then she printed me. The ink was cold against my fingers and she nearly cut off my circulation she pushed me so hard against the form. My fingers were dark blue and I licked them and rubbed them together, trying to get the ink off, but it stained. The officer led me and Lucy to an empty cell and locked the door once we were in. I leaned against the bars and sighed. I had completely screwed myself over. Why hadn't I just let them take Lucy? I love her I guess. I banged my head across the cold metal bars a few times then Lucy spoke. She was sitting on the cot, back pressed into the corner of the cell, her knees drawn up tight to her chest. She looked like she was going to cry.

"I'm sorry Gerard." she said shakily. I walked quickly over to her and sat down on the cot with her.

"Don't be sorry for anything. You're not in trouble, those aren't your drugs are they?" I asked. She shook her head fervently. "Exactly. So as soon as they take the prints, they'll see ours aren't on them, and let us go okay? No worries." I said. I wrapped my arms around her, covering every inch of her that I could, trying to make her feel secure. I rubbed her shoulder and she pressed her forehead into the crook of my arm. I could feel my sleeve getting wet as her tears leaked down onto my elbow. I hugged her tight and rested my chin on the back of her head. She leaned heavily into me. I had no idea what to do with her. Just then the fingerprints lady came by the cell.

"Hey kids, just letting you know we're having some issues with the fingerprint verification machine. So you'll be spending the night here. Is there someone we should call?" she asked. We both shook our heads, saying out parents weren't home. We tried to pass off as brother and sister and the lady seemed to believe us because she walked away. Lucy was still crying. I had no idea what to do. Maybe I should...I don't know sing to her or something. I mean, I'm good at that. But what? How about...um...oh I got it! I started singing her a song and she stopped shaking.

_"Shakedown 1979, cool kids never have the time  
On a live wire right up off the street  
You and I should meet  
Junebug skipping like a stone  
With the headlights pointed at the dawn  
We were sure we'd never see an end to it all  
And I don't even care to shake these zipper blues  
And we don't know  
Just where our bones will rest  
To dust I guess  
Forgotten and absorbed into the earth below  
Double cross the vacant and the bored  
They're not sure just what we have in store  
Morphine city slippin dues down to see  
That we don't even care as restless as we are  
We feel the pull in the land of a thousand guilts  
And poured cement, lamented and assured  
To the lights and towns below  
Faster than the speed of sound  
Faster than we thought we'd go, beneath the sound of hope  
Justine never knew the rules,  
Hung down with the freaks and the ghouls  
No apologies ever need be made, I know you better than you fake it  
To see that we don't even care to shake these zipper blues  
And we don't know just where our bones will rest  
To dust I guess  
Forgotten and absorbed into the earth below  
The street heats the urgency of sound  
As you can see there's no one around..."_ I finished the song and Lucy's breath was slow and even. "Luc?" I whispered. She was asleep. I gently lay her down and pulled the blankets over us. I fell asleep just watching her angelic figure...I awoke to Lucy shaking me gently. I wearily looked up to see the cell door open with two officers standing there.

"Gerard baby they're letting us go." she said. They are? Thank god. But why? I looked from her to the officers, and they began to explain.

"We didn't find either of your prints on the drugs, however we did find multiple prints from a boy named Tomás Sanchez. Either of you kids know him?" Lucy's eyes got wide.

**LUCY'S POV**

"We didn't find either of your prints on the drugs, however we did find multiple prints from a boy named Tomás Sanchez. Either of you kids know him?" the officer asked. Oh my god. I started nodding like I was having a seizure.

"HE WAS THERE!" I said a little louder than necessary. "Um, this girl spilled some stuff on my shirt..." I said. I lifted up my sweatshirt to reveal the beer stain just for proof. "And he held my bag while I went into the bathroom to clean off." I said. The officers nodded. I was on a roll here. I was willing to bet any amount of money he'd slipped the drugs into my bag while I was in the bathroom. But why? What does Tomás Ruiz Sanchez have against me? Wait...Tomás is Bryce's cousin isn't he? And Bryce is Lexi's boyfriend and she...LEXI. She's behind this. I almost said that out loud, but I stopped myself. I was going to take matters with Lexi into my own hands...They released us and told us they were sorry for having to keep us all night. They also told us that Tomás was going to face criminal charges for possession and distribution of crack cocaine and would probably going to jail. Gerard and I hugged and caught a bus back to his house. From there he drove me home and suddenly my stomach bottomed out for at least the bazillionth time. My parents were going to kill me. I mean, not just for staying out all night, I do that all the time...but not with this image I don't. I have two piercings per ear, and one in my lip, my hair is streaked blue and much shorter, I'm wearing enough makeup to streak the faces of a whole guerilla attack force, and I'm dressed head to toe in black. My parents were going to have a seizure. I took a deep breath and walked into my house, preparing to have my eardrums blown out.


	11. Chapter 10

**CHAPTER TEN**

**LUCY'S POV**

Of course, my parents weren't home. Just because my world had stopped turning for about twelve hours didn't mean theirs did. They were at the infamous "office" until nine o clock, just like every day. My house suddenly had this weird wacky threatening vibe. It worried me, and I wished I'd asked Gerard to come inside with me. I'd never felt weird in my house before, and I just walked upstairs slowly, deciding to take a bath in my parents bathroom. Of course, I'm not allowed to do this, but I figured what the hell. I walked upstairs and into my room and got undressed, wrapped my body in a towel and grabbed my CD player, putting a CD of Frankie's old band Pencey Prep inside. I walked back downstairs and into my parents bathroom. It's huge. It's like...bigger than their bedroom with a huge walk in shower, and a tub that's a cross between a pool and a Jacuzzi. It has jets, its got to be at least seven feet by seven feet, and had little benches built in the sides. The damn tub had STEPS leading into it. Steps with a BANISTER! The whole room was lined with brown marble and faux gold as well as real silver. I turned on the tap and turned it all the way to hot. Steam started to rise from the water and I sat on the edge in my towel, waiting for the tub to fill up, which was going to take at least five minutes. Eventually it filled up and I stepped in, burning my skin from the hot water. I slid into it, but gritted my teeth against the heat and turned the knob to cold, just to even things out. Once it cooled off a little I shut off the water, plugged the drain, and switched on the CD. "19" came on. God I love that song. I sat down on one of the little benches and squirted some bubble bath soap into the water, swirling it slowly with my hand until a thick purple coating of bubbles sat on top of the water. I just sat back, leaned my head against the lining of the tub, and shut my eyes. I don't remember falling asleep, I don't remember going under, but I do remember waking up on the floor of the bathroom, naked, in a huge puddle of water, with someone taking their mouth off of mine, then pushing in on my chest. I realized I wasn't breathing, and took a huge gasping breath. Lots of water poured up my throat and out of my mouth. I spit it straight up and it landed on my face. My chest heaved as I sucked in as much air as possible.

"SHE'S AWAKE!" shrieked Ray towards the door. He suddenly realized that I was naked, and ran and grabbed a towel, which he covered me with. He blushed bright red. "Sorry. I mean, I wasn't exactly concentrating on your...I mean you...sorry." he said. I just sat up and smiled.

"Thanks Ray." I said. "Now you want to tell me what happened?" I asked. Gerard came bounding into the room, and as soon as he saw me, ran and fell to his knees, kissing me hard. I pushed him off, my breathing not quite right yet. "Again. What happened?" I asked. Gerard and Ray started to explain.

"See we all came over because we weren't sure if you were okay, because of the whole thing last night and with your parents." said Gerard.

"And we came in through the window." added Ray.

"Right and we didn't see you in your room, so we started searching the lower levels, and I saw your arm through the door to your parents bathroom and came in to say hi." added Gerard.

"And your head was under the water." said Ray.

"You weren't breathing, and Ray pulled you out because he knew CPR." finished Gerard.

"Oh." I said, smiling. "Thank you so much Ray. I guess you saved my life." I added. Wow. Ray saved my life.

**GERARD'S POV**

"SHE'S AWAKE!" I heard Ray shout. I came running into the bathroom and saw Lucy sitting up, her head against the wall. I couldn't stop myself, I just jumped on her and kissed her as hard as I could. What would you have done? I mean, she could have died! I was just so glad she was still there to kiss. But then she pushed me off. She had her hand on her chest and her breath was heaving. Wow, stupid Gerard, you kiss a girl whose still trying to get oxygen. She sat back, and we explained exactly what'd happened.

"Again. What happened?" asked Lucy. Ray and I started to explain.

"See we all came over because we weren't sure if you were okay, because of the whole thing last night and with your parents." I started.

"And we came in through the window." added Ray.

"Right and we didn't see you in your room, so we started searching the lower levels, and I saw your arm through the door to your parents bathroom and came in to say hi." I added.

"And your head was under the water." said Ray.

"You weren't breathing, and Ray pulled you out because he knew CPR." I finished. I suddenly felt the bottom of my stomach drop out.

"Oh." Lucy said, smiling. "Thank you so much Ray. I guess you saved my life." she said. That's why I felt bad. Ray saved her. Not me. I wasn't Lucy's hero. Isn't a girl's boyfriend supposed to be her hero or something? And what was I now? I was the boyfriend who called on his friend because he didn't know what to do when his girlfriend started to drown. Stupid me. I mean, why didn't I at least try? Well, technically trying, if I'd done it wrong I could have killed her, but still! Wait...okay I'm not making sense anymore. Oh my god. Lucy and Ray are hugging. I guess he's going to become Lucy's new best friend now right? And then what? Is she going to fall for him or something? Oh wow, Gerard stop you're jealous of one of your best friends. Stop it.


	12. Chapter 11

**CHAPTER ELEVEN**

**LEXI'S POV**

I cannot believe this is happening. Tomás was thrown in jail yesterday for drug possession and distribution. Another disaster story of hurricane Lucy Dawson. What a bitch! Well, at least I still reign supreme at school. I was walking to my locker, Gina and Shauna running to keep up with me. What? I walk fast when I'm pissed off. As I got close to my locker, I noticed someone trying to stuff something through the locker grate. It was that blonde kid that I see Lucy hanging with sometimes. I think his name is Bob or something. He saw me and backed away from my locker.

"What are you doing loser?" I asked. He thought for a second, then extended an envelope towards me.

"This got delivered to my house by mistake." he said. "I live on twenty-four Elmwood Place, you live on twenty-four Elmwood STREET." he added, looking at me with one eyebrow up and a smug smirk on his face. How the fuck does he know where I live?

"How the fuck do you know where I live?" I asked. He smiled and turned, walking away. I didn't bother asking him again. It freaked me out a bit, but the less I had to talk to him and his friends, the better off I was. I opened up the envelope and an info packet came out, the cover was covered in admirably good sketches of stars...and coins? I opened it up, and across the top it read "WHORE TRAINING ACADAMY. LEARN TO TURN YOUR BITCHY MIND INTO A WAY TO EARN EXTRA CASH!" My mouth dropped. Lucy and her geeky new friends did it. I dropped the fake packet and crumpled it with my heel. A boy from the basketball picket it up.

"Finally Lexi." he said. "Someone is recognizing you for your true talent." he was laughing with his friends at the brochure. More and more people came over, and started laughing about it. PEOPLE WERE PASSING IT AROUND!

"It's...it's not mine!" I said. I could feel my face going pink, even below my pink blush. Shauna was laughing (that whore) and said

"Um...it's a personalized packet hun. Your name is all over it." I ripped it away from her. She was absolutely right. "Lexi, you too can learn to earn money doing something you probably do with Bryce every time you get drunk at a party! For a free interview, just come by twenty-four Elmwood place any time!" it read. BOB. That jerk! This was no doubt done by Lucy and her friends. I stormed off, and Shauna and Gina finally ran after me. Gina was the first to stop laughing.

"Come on Lexi you have to admit that after the drug thing, that was a pretty good comeback." she said. What? There wasn't supposed to be a comeback at all! I whipped around and glared at her.

"Lucy won't get away with this." I said. Shauna and Gina looked at each other.  
"What are you going to do about it?" asked Shauna. What was I going to do about it? I could torch her house. I could trash her locker. I could get someone to run past her and tear her shirt off in the hallway. I could do just about anything I wanted to. But none of it would really get to her. As we rounded the corner, I saw her. Lucy, and her four geeky boys and that weird girl with the brown hair. I saw Lucy sitting on the bench, Gerard's head in her lap, Lucy running her fingers through his black hair. They looked so happy together. They looked like what people in love should look like. Then it hit me. Exactly what I needed to do. Eww...Lexi...this is going to be so hard. But I need to do it. It was the one thing that would truly tear Lucy Dawson to shreds...I grabbed the fake brochure from Shauna. Hmmm. Yeah, perfect idea. Then I heard Gerard speak.

"So, Lucy, you want to come over and watch a movie on Friday?" he asked. Lucy nodded. Perfect.

"I'll be there around eight." Lucy said. Perfect. Friday at eight it is then.

LUCY'S POV

It's been six days since I got home from my night with Gerard in jail. That means it's been seven days since Gerard and I had sex. And I'm afraid. Because I'm late. I mean...I'm NEVER late. My period has been every twenty six days EXACTLY ever since I got it when I was thirteen. I should not be five days late. It just doesn't happen. Unless of course I'm...NO. NO I am NOT pregnant. I can't be pregnant...I just can't...I mean...what if I am?

**GERARD'S POV**

Lucy was due here in about ten minutes. I'd set up some popcorn and soda cans in front of the couch, rented three old horror movies, and shoved Mikey upstairs. And of course, this time I remembered to do a condom check. That nasty awkwardness wasn't going to happen again. Ever. I shuddered just thinking about it. I sat on the couch just picking at my cuticles, when the doorbell rang. I jumped up, checked the mirror, and ran to open the door. But when I opened it...it wasn't Lucy. It was...Lexi? She was dressed in probably the smallest amount of clothing I'd ever seen someone wear without getting arrested. And even weirder, every inch of it looked like it had come from Hot Topic or something. She was wearing a spaghetti strap corset top that was white with black lace running across the whole top, a tiny black pleated skirt with tiny white stripes. It was the same skirt that Lucy had laughed at when we were at Hot Topic, calling it "slutty" and "whore uniform". Under the skirt were black fishnets against bare skin, and knee high, patent leather boots covered in buckles with at least five inch platforms. Her makeup was dark black all around, and blood red lipstick. Her blonde hair was super straightened down and partly covered her face, because she's parted it to the extreme left. What was this girl up to? She walked right past me without saying a word and walked over to the living room. I followed her, I wanted her out before Lucy showed up. I mean, what was Lucy going to think if she saw Lexi sitting in my living room looking like a prostitute? She sat down on the couch, and crossed her legs, arms spread across the back of the couch. She looked at me and then looked at the empty cushion next to her. I sat down, but wouldn't look at her. I just stared blankly at the TV.

"What do you want?" I asked, trying to make my voice as cold as possible. She turned to me.

"Well I took an interest in that brochure, and there was no one home at the address they gave, so I came here..." she said. Huh?  
"The bro-Oh that." I said. "That was just a joke you know. To get back at you after the drug thing. We know you were behind that whole thing you bitch." I said, angry now. She started to laugh. Then she moved closer to me. She knelt on the cushion, knees bumping against my thigh.

"Oh come on Gerard you don't have to be so mean to me." she said, rubbing my shoulder. I pushed her hand off, and then she moved her leg so that she was totally straddling me. Oh god, lap dance position. What was this girl trying to pull? I know she didn't want me. She hated me. She hated me and Lucy and all my friends. That's when it hit me: she was doing this to get to Lucy. I tried to push her off me, but she just wrapped her hands around my neck and actually started to kiss me. Oh my god. She started to kiss me! She was completely revolting. She didn't kiss nearly as well as Lucy did. I could feel myself wanting to vomit. I pushed her off towards the side and she fell backwards onto the couch...and dragged me down with her. THAT GIRL IS STRONG! I grabbed the back of the couch and kept trying to get away from her grip, but the harder I strained the tighter she held me. Then I heard the front door open. Lucy was here.

**LUCY'S POV**

I needed to tell Gerard I might be pregnant. It's been eight days since I should have started my period and I knew that was not normal. I mean, it happens, but not to me. We have a movie date at his house now, so I'll tell him now, when he's in a good mood. Gerard. I might be pregnant. There, easy as that. I walked up his front walk and the door was open a little. I pushed it open and walked inside.

"Gerard?" I called. No answer. I looked in the kitchen, no Gerard. Not even Mikey. I walked through the dining room, towards the living room. I saw Gerard flailing on the couch. Looking for the remote? Then I got closer...and saw Lexi underneath him wearing some kind of Gothic Slut outfit. My head went numb.

"WHAT THE FUCK?!" I yelled. Lexi shot up from under Gerard. He looked at me, face and neck covered in lipstick, hair messier than a rat's next. Lexi was looking from me to Gerard, then back at me. She looked surprised, but almost smug at the same time. She started to speak.

"Oh...Gerard...baby...it looks like we've been caught!" she said. He looked at her, furious.  
"Yeah it looks like YOU have!" he spat. I was almost speechless. I was only able to choke out four words.

"What's going on here?" I whispered. Gerard rushed to explain. Lexi just sat there under him, smiling ever so slightly.

"Lucy. You've got to believe me. I was waiting for you...and she came in looking like...that! And she just comes over here and starts...well you can see...Lucy...uh...you don't believe a word of this do you?" he finished, looking very defeated. I shook my head. "I'm sorry." he whispered. "Lucy I love you." he chocked out. A tear dropped down his cheek and my heart almost melted. I felt my own eyes welling up with tears. I just shook my head, turned around, and stormed out. I didn't look back once, I just ran, started my car, and drove too fast all the way home...

**GERARD'S POV**

I tried to explain. I knew she'd never believe me, and she didn't. She walked out. Lexi smirked at me.

"I think my job here is done." she said, sliding out from under me. "I'm going to go home and...burn this outfit." she said, looking down disgustedly at herself. I watched her leave, and as soon as she was gone I burst out in tears. Lucy hated me. I mean, she had to hate me after seeing me with her ex-best friend and the school whore! Lucy is my whole life, what am I supposed to do without her? I can't live with myself if she hates me. I walked into the kitchen and opened the refrigerator, grabbing a bottle of wine. I ripped out the cork, turned the bottle on its side and let the cold bittersweet liquid slosh around in my mouth. Immedietly I felt that ugly comfort that I got whenever I drank. But this time it wasn't comfort. It was just ugly. I tipped more booze into my mouth, waiting for the comfort part, but it only got worse. I got really depressed really fast. Over the course of maybe five minutes actually. Suddenly, my gaze was pulled across the room, to our house "junk drawer". I put the bottle down and walked over. I opened the drawer and pulled out the big black scissors. They were new, shiny, and sharp. They were almost...inviting. I sat down on the floor with the scissors and opened and closed them a few times. I pulled down the bottle of wine and took a few more sips, then started to slide the blade across my arm.


	13. Chapter 12

**CHAPTER TWELVE**

**GERARD'S POV**

I didn't die that night after Lucy left. Mikey found me on the floor, bleeding out, and got me to the emergency room without a license. Good kid. But hell, I would have done the same for him. They stitched up my arm before I bled out too much; a hundred and sixty four stitches for six cuts, each more than seven centimeters long. Apparently that's like, suicide watch mode, because I've been in the hospital for the past four days, actually being watched by CAMERAS twenty-four-seven. If I so much as LOOK at my arm, a nurse comes in and asks me if I need anything. I've been doing some writing lately, just finished up a song about this damn hospital and the fucking cabin fever that comes with it. I called it "This Is The Best Day Ever". Why? I don't know. I mean, there's this girl, who looks almost like Lucy from before Liz made her over. She's in a coma. Sometimes, when I'm half-asleep or drugged up, I look at her, and in my head she turns to me and talks to me like Lucy used to before the...incident. I hear Lucy's voice saying that she loves me, and that she's going to come get me out of this damn hospital. See I'd believe that was really happening, but her voice would always fade away as she would say something about lighting Ferris Wheels on fire. Yeah, weird I know. Just then, a nurse came in, all smiles, with Mikey.

"Okay Gerard, ready to go home?" she asked. I sat up.

"Really? I'm out?" I asked. She nodded and Mikey tossed me my clothes. I dove under the blankets and changed into the jeans and t-shirt I was wearing the night I slashed up my arm. I slipped on my shoes and filled out some paperwork at the door. I walked with Mikey out the front entrance and felt fresh air for the first time in days. I don't normally like the outdoors, but it was about ten times better than hospital air. Mikey got in the driver's seat. "No way little bro. You may have gotten me here, but I'm getting me home." I said. He slapped the steering wheel and slid over to the passenger seat instead. The whole way home he kept staring at the stitches on my arm. The stitch scars themselves had almost faded, but the actual cuts themselves were red and raw and often started bleeding again.

"Gerard..." he started weakly.

"Hmm?" I answered. I knew he was going to ask me why I did it, but I wanted to sound confident, make him feel better.

"...Why'd you do it? Why'd you try to...try to...you get it." he stammered. I didn't answer. I said I knew he was asking it, I didn't say I had an answer.

"I honestly don't have an answer for that Mikey." I choked out. Lucy. Lucy hating me. That was my answer. But if I told that to Mikey, he'd think I was totally crazy. Well, he thinks I'm totally crazy anyway doesn't he? Well, I'll just let him think what he needs to think I suppose. I need to call Lucy. I need to talk to her before I see her in school tomorrow. When we got home I slinked down to my room and changed into some red boxers and a black t-shirt. I grabbed my cell phone and pressed Speed Dial 4: Lucy's Cell phone. Ring. Ring. Ring.

"Hello?" I shot up.

"Lucy? It's Gerard!" click. She hung up. I stared at my phone, the display read CALL ENDED. I dialed again. Ring. Ring.

"Gerard what do you want?" she said without even a hello.

"To explain." I whispered.  
"Okay. I'm listening. Explain." she said testily. Thank god she was giving me a chance.

"Okay. Just hear me out because I'm telling you the truth. I was waiting for you, putting out some chips, doing a head-count of the movies, and the doorbell rings. I thought it was you, so I opened the door and it was Lexi...looking like the hoe bag that she is! I just kind of stood there trying to figure out what the fuck was going on, and she just walked right past me. I only followed her because I wanted her to get out! She just sat down on the couch and made me sit next to her. I called her a bitch and said I knew that she was behind the drug thing with Tomás, and she just got on top of me and just started fucking making out with me! I shoved her off and she pulled me down with her and would not stop! Then you came in and saw her and...yeah." I'd tripped over my words so many times. I just had to tell her everything that happened. I waited for her to reply.

"That's it huh?" She said. She sounded so angry.

"Yeah Lucy that's it." I said.

"You certainly are a good storyteller Gerard." she whispered.

"Lucy no-" click. She hung up again. I didn't call her back again. I couldn't do it. I could barely BREATHE the lump in my throat was so huge. I just let the tears fall down my face and I flopped down face-first on my bed. I rolled over on my side and looked at the empty space next to me. The morning after that party I saved her from flashed back to me.

"Why didn't you just fuck me last night while you had the chance?"

"You mean you would have wanted me to take you to my house, take advantage of you because you were drunk and wouldn't have been able to fight me off then leave you here?"

"Any other guy would have. "What makes you so special?"

"Maybe I care. Maybe I really care. Maybe I see you as a person and not something I can just use and throw away. Maybe I actually love-"

"You love me?"

"I...I shouldn't have said it. It was dumb...you can't be with a guy like me...I shouldn't have said..."

"Say what you feel."

"I think I love you Lucy. But I know you don't..."

"I don't know what I think of you. Honestly, I haven't spent enough time with you to say what I think of you."

"Maybe we can fix that." I had fixed it. She did love me. But she hated me now. I knew it.

**LUCY'S POV**

School. Gerard is due back at school today. I've been feeling so shitty since Friday all because of him. I've never tourtured myself over a guy like this before...what's wrong with me? I love him that's what's wrong. I was walking to first period English with Liz, Frank, Ray, Bob, and Mikey, who were all siding with me. Mikey seemed really weird today, like he was hiding something, but I didn't push it.

"GUYS! GUYS WAIT UP!" I heard Gerard shout. We all turned around and saw him running to catch up with us. We turned around and kept walking. Frank was lagging behind a little, so Gerard caught him by the shoulder. Everyone kept walking, and Frank didn't turn around immedietly. "Frank. Frank what's up? How've you been? I haven't talked to you in days! What's wrong with everyone?" He asked. We all turned around, marveling at his ignorance. Frank pulled Gerard's hand off his shoulder.

"You screwed up dude." he said. We all walked away, leaving Gerard looking completely crestfallen. Liz and Bob both put their arms around my shoulders, trying to help me avoid another tear-fest. I'd been breaking down randomly all over the place, partly from feeling betrayed by Gerard, partly from being worried about him. He'd been gone without a trace since I'd seen him on Friday, and Mikey wouldn't tell us what'd happened to him, only that he was coming back today; Tuesday. First period, second period, and third period went very quickly, seeing as it was a half-day. It was October thirty-first, Halloween. The school gave us a half day, so that we'd all be out of jail for our pranks by the next morning (hopefully). We weren't going out. Everyone was sleeping over at my house, which was pretty normal actually, for Frank's birthday. Movies, balloons, truth or dare, and cake. We'd invited Gerard weeks ago, and we didn't see the point in un-inviting him, we just hoped he'd get the hint that we didn't really want him there. I walked to fourth period Gym, which I had with Gerard, and saw him as I walked in the door. No one was changing today because of the less time, and we were going to play something that the teacher called "trust fall". She explained the rules.

"Each student will have a letter, A or B. As will stand behind the Bs and hold their arms straight out in front of them. The Bs will spread their arms like wings out to the side, and have to decide if they trust the A behind them, to fall into their arms and let them catch them. Raise your hand if you want to help me demonstrate." I didn't see the harm, so I raised my hand. I had been concentrating on not looking at Gerard, but that turned out to be a mistake, seeing as his hand and mine were the only two in the air. The teacher called on us both. "Okay, Dawson and Way come on up. Let's have Gerard be A and Lucy be B. Take your positions." she said. Gerard stood behind me and held out his arms. I spread mine out to the side. "Okay Lucy, do you trust Gerard?" asked the gym teacher.

"I did." I said.

"Well..." she said. "Lets try to make you trust again. Gerard, do you think you can catch Lucy?" she asked him.

"I'll always be there to catch her when she falls. Even if she doesn't know it." he whispered. My heart stopped.

"Good. So Lucy, fall back." said the teacher. I shut my eyes, stiffened my muscles, and fell back. My head hit his chest, and his elbows angled in my underarms. He'd caught me perfectly. I didn't look at his face. I just stared at the Gym wall. The teacher partnered everyone else up, and we spent the rest of the period falling backwards. It made no sense at all. But at one point, I fell a little harder than I meant to, and Gerard stumbled backwards a little bit, his arms flying in front of my face a little. That's when I saw the cuts. Six of them, barely healed, covered in little stitch marks. I grabbed his arm and spun around to face him. Why the hell did he do this to himself. I felt tears filling my eyes as I ran my fingers lightly across the scabbed lines. A tear dropped down onto one of them and he jerked his arm away, grimacing.

"Sorry." he said. "They're sensitive." he added, extending his arm again. I cradled his forearm gently in my hands and then looked at his face. He looked like he was holding back twice as many tears as I was as he looked into my eyes.

"Gerard why?" I asked.

"I didn't see the point in stopping myself. I mean, you hated me, so who would have missed me?" he choked out. I grabbed him and wrapped my arms around his neck. I started to sob and shake uncontrollably.

"I would have missed you. You were for real about Lexi weren't you?" she asked, standing back and holding my face in her hands. I nodded and she just hugged me again.

"I love you Gerard." she whispered. I wrapped my arms around her waist and just kept squeezing tighter and tighter, never wanting to let go.

"Lucy I don't know what I'd ever do without you." I said.

"Don't worry. I promise I'm not going anywhere." she said. "And we will get that bitch back." she added. I broke away from her and turned to Mikey, who had funnily enough gotten partnered with Lexi. I whistled at him, and he smiled and dropped his arms, just as Lexi fell. She crashed to the ground with an indignant shriek. The gym teacher was trying to sort out exactly what had happened, and couldn't get Mikey in trouble, because the bell rang. Gerard and I parted, and agreed to meet at my house after he'd gotten his things. Tonight was going to be so much fun. Halloween and Frankie's birthday. What better excuse for fun?


	14. Chapter 13

**CHAPTER THIRTEEN**

**FRANK'S POV**

Well, Gerard and Lucy made up...and boy did they make up. We're all at Lucy's house now and Gerard and Lucy have barely been apart. Either kissing or hugging or just saying how much they love each other. Honestly its starting to annoy the shit out of everyone. Even me and Liz aren't this bad. Oh well, the cake's ready, so they'll have to take their hands off each other to eat won't they? WON'T THEY?

**LUCY'S POV**

Liz and I had been spending the past hour making Frankie's cake...or attempting too. It was chocolate cake, with vanilla icing that we'd dyed green with food coloring. We'd gotten a tube full of black icing and squeezed out HAPPY BIRTHDAY FRANKIE on it. I dipped my finger in the icing and tried it. Considering it looked like a dead animal, it tasted pretty good. I ran back into the banquet hall (yes my house has a fucking banquet hall isn't that sad? It's where we all set up our sleeping bags and Ray and Bob moved one of our TVs into it, and a card table with some chairs.) I ran into the banquet hall and wrapped a t-shirt around Frank's face and dimmed the lights. We all started singing "happy birthday" as Liz and I brought in the cake. Gerard pulled off Frank's blindfold and Liz and I let Frank admire the cake.

"Wow girls. Thanks." he said, giving Liz a kiss. I started slicing the cake into six pieces and I handed one off to everyone. Then I looked at Liz, she nodded, and we lifted our slices in our hands. I smiled as Gerard raised an eyebrow at me. Then his jaw dropped as I jumped on top of him and shoved the cake in his face. Liz followed suit with Frank, who had been sitting right next to Gerard. Then I screamed; someone had jumped on my back: Mikey. He'd reached around and pushed his cake in my face, and Bob had jumped on Liz. Ray was just sitting there laughing, so we all ran and tackled him, shoving excess cake from our faces, onto his. After about ten minutes we were sticky and nasty, so the boys went into my parents big bathroom to clean off, and Liz and I went to my room to use my bathroom. Once I'd showered, I let Liz go in, and I changed into black sweatpants and a tight hot pink t-shirt. I rolled down my sweatpants so the waistband rested against my hip bone and looked at my stomach in the mirror. Was there a baby in there? The thought made my head spin. Then Liz walked out, wearing the clothes I'd let her borrow. She gave me a funny look.  
"Hey..." she said. "Have you been eating a lot lately?" she asked, her gaze now directed at my stomach. Actually I had been eating more. Aren't you supposed to eat more? Because you need to give the baby nutrition?

"Um...yeah..." I started. I didn't know if I should tell her or not. "Liz...are you and Frank...you know...intimate?" I asked. It sounded really stupid once it was out of my mouth, and she raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah...sometimes...why?" she asked. Her eyebrows furrowed, worried.  
"Do you use protection?" I asked. She looked surprised.

"Of course. We'd be stupid not to. Wait...Lucy what's wrong?" she asked. I flopped down on the floor, hands on my stomach. "Lucy..." she said, sitting down next to me. "Did you and Gerard have sex or something?" At that point I couldn't control myself. Tears started leaking down my cheeks one by one. I nodded. "Do you think the condom failed or something hun?" asked Liz. I shook my head. She stopped. "Did you even...use a condom?" she asked, eyes wide. I shook my head. She jumped, shocked. "Are you crazy?" she hissed at me. I started shaking, and Liz calmed down. She put an arm around my shoulder. "Okay. Okay. When's your period due?" she asked.

"Eight days ago." I said.

"And it hasn't come?" she asked.

"No." I said.

"And you've started...expanding." she said, glancing at my stomach again. "Do you want to go to a doctor?" she asked. I nodded.

"Will you come with me?" I asked. She nodded.

"Yeah. Yeah Lucy of course I'll come with you." Just then Gerard called up the stairs.

"LUCY! LIZ! GET DOWN HERE WE JUST HAD THE BEST IDEA!" he shouted. I looked at Liz, she looked back at me, confused. She grabbed a tissue and wiped my eyes.

"We won't tell him yet okay?" she said. "We can wait until after you get tested okay?" she said. I nodded.

"Do you think he's gonna have that much of a problem with it?" I asked. She rolled her eyes.

"Honestly, I think Gerard is going to spaz from here to the fourth dimension." she said.

"Oh that's real helpful." I muttered.

"BUT! He loves you, and you love him, so you'll work it out. I know you will. Okay?" she said. I nodded and we went downstairs. We arrived back in the banquet hall, to see the boys stuffing their bags with toilet paper, toothpaste, eggs cartons, and bologna.

"What the hell..?" I started. Gerard looked at us and said six words.

"Jacket. Shoes. Cash. Now. Come on." I looked at Liz and she shrugged. We grabbed our sneakers, hoodies, and wallets and followed the boys out to Frank's van. Frank stepped on the gas and we were all thrown back in our seats. He drove to the party supply store and he and Ray, who was sitting in the front passenger seat, ran in. They returned about ten minutes later, and equipped each of us with two cans of spray paint, three cans of crazy string, some permanent markers, and some wigs and capes, which everyone put on. Frank sped off again and the next time we stopped, we all got out. My jaw dropped when I saw we were in front of Lexi's house. She wasn't home of course, Gina had driven the two of them to Shauna and Terri's annual costume party blowout. Ray ran around to the garage and I followed him. He started picking the lock and then opened the door. There had to be ten cars in the garage. Gerard came running up behind me.

"Which one is Lexi's" he asked, reaching into his backpack.

"Um, the yellow land rover, over there." I said. He pulled out a package of bologna and dropped his bag. He started shredding the slices into smaller strips, and laying them on the hood of her car. He formed a letter ,then a word. My jaw dropped. "Oh. My. GOD!" I said. Gerard had written SLUT in bologna on the hood of Lexi's car. He pulled out his green spray paint and sprayed the area all around the bologna strips, like they were an outline.

"There." he said. "That'll be some nice artwork." In an hour that shit will have done its job, strips the paint right from under the slice. She pulls of the bologna, you have white writing with a green background on a yellow car. She'll love that won't she?" he asked. smiling at me. I just smirked, then I heard Frank and Liz working on their own project our front; egging the house. I ran and grabbed an egg too. I looked at the egg in my hand, then looked at the house. Did I really want to do this? Liz looked at me.

"Why are you throwing it Lucy?" she asked.

"Huh?" I said.

"What anger is behind that egg?" she asked. I still didn't get it. "Like this." she picked up an egg. "THIS IS FOR MAKING MY FRIEND FEEL LIKE A TRAITOR!" she yelled, and threw the egg. It splattered against the house with a loud THUMP and CRACK. I smiled as Frank threw one saying

"THIS IS FOR...BEING A STUPID UGLY WHORE!" Gerard grabbed an egg.

"THIS IS FOR GETTING ME AND MY GIRLFRIEND THROWN IN JAIL!" he said, throwing it. Then I knew what I was going to say.  
"THIS IS FOR MAKING THE FIRST SEVENTEEN YEARS OF MY LIFE SUCK!" I shrieked. I threw the egg and it smashed through a window. My jaw dropped. Oops. Everyone stared at me, and just then we heard a car. Gina's car. We left the stuff and went running back to the van. We dog piled in the back and just sat there, hoping that Lexi thought it would just be an empty van. I stared out of the bottom of the back door window, as Gina's car pulled up. I could hear snatches of their voices as they got out of the car.

"What the..."

"Lex who did this?"

"Is my garage door open?" I heard Lexi ask. I buried my face in Gerard's chest to keep myself from shrieking with laughter. Suddenly we heard Lexi's scream of anger pierce the night.  
"That's our cue!" said Frank, and hit the gas. We got home, laughing and joking through my front door. I glanced at the VCR clock; One in the morning. Everyone collapsed on the floor, not necessarily on their sleeping bag, or even on a sleeping bag at all. We all just kind of fell asleep in one big pile in the middle of the room actually. Once I was content that everyone was asleep, I walked quietly upstairs. I ended up in my room, staring at myself in my mirror. I lifted my shirt up to right below my chest and just examined my stomach. It was bulging, but not THAT much. Well duh. It's not like I'm really that pregnant. I squeaked a little when I felt someone's arms slide around my bare stomach. I turned around and kissed Gerard.

"What are you doing up here all by yourself?" he whispered. I shrugged. He looked at me in the mirror, as I watched my stomach. "What? You think your fat or something? Are you having an eating disorder moment?" he asked, laughing. I couldn't help but laugh when he did, even with all this fear and stress weighting my mind. He kissed me again then rested his chin on my shoulder. Somehow, with Gerard everything but him and me just seemed to disappear. I yawned. "Tired?" he asked. I nodded. "Allow me to be of assistance." he said. I squealed and laughed as he lifted me up, and carried me over to my bed. He laid me down gently and covered me with my blanket. He rolled over me and lay down against the wall, my left side. I turned my head to look at him, and for a while we just stared at each other. I ran my fingers through his hair once or twice, and he closed his eyes and smiled at my touch. I realized I loved him too much to not tell him.

"Baby..." I started. "Do you love me?" I asked. He looked surprised.

"Of course I love you." he said.

"Will you always love me, even if you're mad at me?" I asked.

"I could never be mad at you." he whispered. "What's wrong?" He asked. I took a deep breath.

"Remember that day...after the first day of school...when we..." I asked.

"How could I forget?" he said, smiling wide. I rolled my eyes at him.

"Well...what if we made a mistake? No. Not a mistake...I won't call it a mistake that's just mean...I mean...what if something happened that was...unexpected?" I finished. Gerard thought for a minute.

"Do you mean...are you saying...Oh my GOD you're pregnant aren't you? Oh Jesus...Oh this is...this is..." he stopped looking at my face. "This is great." he said. He was actually smiling. "Sorry. I was just...surprised. Um...are you sure?" he asked.

"No. I'm...Liz and I are going to a doctor I'm...I'm sorry." I said. He shushed me with a soft kiss.  
"Don't be sorry. I'm serious, this is really wonderful. I mean, it shouldn't have happened, but now that it has...I guess it's kind of...okay it's this crazy rush." he said, laughing a little bit. "I'm happy. I really am." he said. And then I knew, maybe things would actually be okay.


	15. Chapter 14

**CHAPTER FOURTEEN**

**GERARD'S POV**

Lucy is pregnant. God this threw me for a loop. I couldn't believe it. Who would have thought that the ONE TIME we had sex, she'd get pregnant. Life's not fair. I'm happy though. I mean, I wish Lucy wasn't pregnant, but she is, so since there's nothing we can do about it, why not be happy? Yes we'd gone to the doctor, yes Lucy really was pregnant. It had been a month; it was now December, and Lucy was about two months pregnant. I was kissing her good-bye, and still refusing to tell her where I was going.

"Come on baby what are you up to?" she asked. I shook my head.

"You'll seeeeee." I said, pulling away from her. I knelt down and kissed her stomach. "Bye bye baby." I said. I came back up and kissed Lucy again. "And bye bye mommy." I said. She laughed. I got in my car and drove away.

**LUCY'S POV**

"Bye bye baby." he said to my stomach. Gerard came back up and kissed me again. "And bye bye mommy." he added. I laughed, he was so cute. Liz came up behind me. She was really my only female friend, and vice-versa, so she spent a lot of time at my house.  
"Wanna get back to work?" she said.

"Grrr. I'm tired of paint." I said, sulking a little. Liz laughed.

"Well that's fine because I just finished while you and Gerard were down here messing around." she said. "It's time for wallpaper strips." she added.

"Oh, yay! The blue strip with the glow-in-the dark stars?" I asked.

"Mhm." said Liz. We ran up the stairs to my parents level. There was a spare room in there that was a little smaller than my room. My parents hardly ever used it. We were going to turn it into a nursery. Me, Liz, Ray, Frank, and Mikey were working on it behind Gerard's back. Sort of a surprise. We'd painted the walls lavender, and we had a wallpaper strip that was going to go around the room, halfway down the walls, that was a sky blue with glow in the dark stars. At first I worried about putting the room here, on my parent's level of the house, until they came home a few days ago and stayed the night. They'd brought with them two Aero beds, which they'd blown up and slept on the floor in the ground level. What threw me for a loop was that they'd slept in separate beds. Weird. When I asked them why they weren't in their room, they said "it's to stressful to settle down when we're leaving again in three days." Of course, they didn't see I was pregnant, thank god for baggy sweatshirts. I firmly intended to have this baby before telling my parents about it. They were gone two days later and Liz and the boys came over to work on it again. They kept giving me little baby gifts, which I thought was so cute. Ray had even bought a crib! And it was black too, which was perfect. Liz and I started putting the glue on the wallpaper, after laying out the lines. Once it was up, it looked perfect. I'd gone to the Disney store and bought two rugs. One was in the shape of Jack Skellington, the other in the shape of Sally, from the Nightmare Before Christmas. I placed them in random parts of the floor and then Mikey walked in.

"Hey guys. Wow, the room looks great." he said, looking around.

"Thanks." I said. "Any of the other guys coming?" I asked. Mikey shook his head.

"Nah they're helping Bob look for a new drum set. He beat the shit out of the one he has now." he said smiling. "So what's the current project?" he asked.

"Um...well we just finished the wallpaper...oh! The crib!" said Liz.

"Yeah lets get that out of the way..." I said. Mikey brought the box in from the hallway and we spent the next two hours figuring it out. When we finally got it standing, Mikey tested it...by sitting in it himself. He got stuck and we had to tip the whole crib over. Liz and I fell over him, laughing hysterically as he rubbed his sore butt and muttered about the "magical man eating crib".

**GERARD'S POV**

"Hmmm where is it...hmmm...ah! There! Oh, wow these are awesome!" I was in Hot Topic at the mall looking for some things for Lucy. One of the employees came over.

"Need any help sir?" he asked.  
"Um...no I think I'm good thanks." I said.

"Are you sure? Because when you buy this kind of thing, sizing is very important so it's a good idea to have the measurements..." he said again.

"Um, know what? I'll just bring it back if it's wrong because I really don't know her measurements." I said. I grabbed some of the best ones off the rack and paid for them. I looked at them in the car, and tried to picture someone wearing them. It was hard. This was hard, but I just shook the hard thoughts away and drove back to Lucy's. I opened the door to see Liz, Mikey, and Lucy running down the stairs.  
"Hey baby." said Lucy, hugging me. "What's in the bag?" she asked, making a grab for the hot topic bag in my hand. I pulled it away.

"Ah ah ah!" I said, smiling. "You'll see when it's time." I said. She gave me an exaggerated pout and I grabbed her, growling.

"AH! Gerard you geek!" she squealed. I ignored her. I picked her up and set her down on the couch. Mikey and Liz just walked into the kitchen to get some food. Lucy lay on the couch laughing and staring at me, I just hung over her...honestly...as cheesy as it sounds, I was just admiring her. She kissed me.

"I love you." I said. And then it started.

"But I love you more." said Lucy.

"No I love you more." I said.

"No I love you more." she said.

"No I love you ACK-" I was cut off by Mikey grabbing me by my collar and pulling me up to meet his face.

"Don't make me hurt you Gerard." he said, raising an eyebrow at me. I rolled my eyes and Lucy rolled out from under me.

"Sorry Mikey." she said. "But how could I not?" she asked, to me. "Just look at this face!" she cooed, taking my chin in her hand. Mikey laughed, and Lucy let go.

"Well, I'm out of here." said Mikey. "See ya Lucy. Bye sweet cheeks." he joked, slapping my face. I glared at him as he walked out the front door.

"Hey I'm gonna go too." said Liz. "See you guys around." she walked out, waving to us.

**LUCY'S POV**

After Liz and Mikey left, Gerard and I were just sitting together on the couch.

"Hmmmm..." I said, holding my stomach. "Baby is hungry." I said.

"Yeah?" said Gerard. "Want me to make you something?" he asked. He's so perfect. Making his pregnant girlfriend dinner. How could you not love him?

"Uh...there's not much around..." I said.

"Wanna go shopping? Or go to a resteraunt?" asked Gerard. I nodded.

"Let's get some burgers." I said.

"Sounds good to me." said Gerard. I stood up, got my coat and walked with Gerard to his car. "So...where to if we need to get our burger fix?" he asked.

"Um...what about that place...you know on the highway...um...Rory's?" I asked.

"Oh yeah I've been there once or twice they do a good burger. Okay lets go to Rory's." he said, pulling onto the highway. We drove in silence for about ten minutes and I just got some time to think. About the baby, about Gerard, about our future. I mean, I only had seven more months to think. Of course I wanted the baby, of course I wanted to spend my life with Gerard, raising a child with him, but at the same time I was scared. How were we going to support ourselves? Where would we live? Just then, I heard a heart stopping crash of glass, metal, and the squeal of tires stopping short, and I saw the big white van collide with Gerard's car.


	16. Chapter 15

**CHAPTER FIFTEEN**

**GERARD'S POV**

I was sitting in the waiting room, nurses trying to coax me into a hospital room for examination.

"I'm standing up aren't I? I'm breathing, I'm not bleeding, I just want to see my girlfriend. Please?" I said.

"Room twenty seven Mr. Way." said the nurse reluctantly. I ran down the hallway to room twenty seven. Lucy was sitting on the bed, sitting up, and when she saw me she leapt out of the bed. I stopped, staring at her.

"You look...thinner." I said. She looked down and back at me, eyes wide.

"I...I honestly didn't notice that..." she said. Just then a doctor walked in behind me.

"Lucy Dawson?" he asked. She nodded and sat back down on the bed. "I need to talk to you about your baby." he said. He turned to me. "Are you family?" he asked.

"Um no, but I'm her boyfriend, I'm the father." I said.

"I'm going to need you to wait outside." said the doctor. Reluctantly, I walked out, the doctor shutting the door after me. After a few minutes, I heard Lucy sob, and I couldn't stand there wondering anymore. I pushed open the door and Lucy ran over to me. I hugged her tightly and she cried into my chest.

"Lucy what's wrong? Honey, baby what's the matter?" I asked. She wouldn't stop crying. "Lucy come on tell me what's wrong." I said. I was fearing the worst.

"We lost it Gerard." she whispered. I glared at the doctor.

"How do you know?" I asked him. The doctor cleared his throat.

"Well, you remember that when we pulled you from your car, Lucy was unconscious, so we did a check and discovered her pregnancy, upon further investigation we discovered that the baby had died in the crash, so we were able to extract the fetus with an emergency cesarean section. You'll have that scar to prove it..." he trailed off. Lucy lifted up her hospital gown to her mid stomach and exposed a large scar about three inches below her belly button. She dropped the material and hugged me again, crying harder if possible. I wanted to cry, I kept telling myself to cry, but my eyes were like two huge stones in my head, totally unresponsive. I don't think I was even blinking.  
"Is Lucy okay otherwise?" I asked. The doctor nodded.

"You're both clear, you can leave whenever." he said. "I'm sorry." he added as he left. Lucy let go of me and pulled off her hospital gown, replacing them with her jeans and t-shirt. We walked out, my arm around her waist, out and took a bus back to her house. When we got back, we just sat in silence. I was tired. I needed to sleep and gather my thoughts.

"Lucy, do you mind if I take a nap up in your room?" I asked.

"No bab-honey go ahead." she said. I walked up the stairs slowly, I got up to the third level; her parents level, when one of the rooms caught my eye. Was that a crib?

**LUCY'S POV**

I sat on the couch as Gerard went upstairs, trying to stay strong. The truth was I was so broken up about this I just wanted to fall through the floorboards and die on the way down. Why did this have to happen? Why couldn't I have just stayed here and let Gerard make me something? How could I have been so stupid? Okay, my thoughts are getting to me. I stood up and walked around. Then I spotted the hot topic bag, sitting by the front door where Gerard had dropped it yesterday. I glanced at the staircase then started to dig through the bag. What I pulled out first almost made me cry. Okay, I did cry. I pulled out a little red baby bodysuit with a social distortion logo on it. It said "Mommy's little monster" which made me giggle. I folded it neatly and placed it on the floor, reaching back into the bag. I pulled out a black baby bodysuit with a skull and crossbones. Over the skull it said RANCID, like the band, and under it it said DROOLIGANS. I laughed again, folding the bodysuit up and placing it on top of the social distortion one. I pulled out next a cute little Rolling Stones bib with a pacifier on it decorated like the British flag, and finally the cutest pair of baby size black converse sneakers. I was admiring how cute it all was when it hit me. We don't have a baby to give these too. Then something else hit me; Gerard really wanted this baby. He was going to surprise me with these for the baby. He'd really wanted this baby. I broke down right there and cried as I put the clothes back in the bag. Then I sat straight up, realizing I'd left the door to the would-be nursery wide open. Gerard would notice it walking up to my room. Oh shit. I ran up the stairs and ran into the nursery. He was there, sitting on the floor, the back of his head against the crib. He was definitely crying, because he shook his head and rubbed his eyes as soon as he saw me. I could practically feel my own heart melting when I saw him this way. I walked over and sat on his lap, wrapping my arms around his neck.

"You really did want the baby didn't you?" I asked. He shut his eyes again, banging his head a few tines against the bars of the crib. Tears rolled down his cheeks, but he quickly rubbed them away. "Oh...Gerard...I'm sorry." that was all I could think of to say. He looked at me, eyes wide with shock.

"Why the fuck are you sorry? I'm the one who should be apologizing!" he said.

"Baby why? You didn't do anything wrong!" I said. He shook his head and stood up.

"I would have been a terrible father." he started, pacing the floor. "I was driving the fucking car Lucy!" he said angrily. "I didn't see that damn SUV coming off the overpass. I didn't stop in time. I KILLED OUR BABY! I KILLED MY OWN KID BEFORE IT WAS EVEN BORN!" he shouted between sobs. I'd never seen Gerard this upset. He just stood there panting, looking for more words to express what he was thinking. At least he'd gotten that much out; I couldn't think of a thing. I just sat there on the floor shaking my head. For once I was the one not crying, watching Gerard fall to pieces. I wanted there to be something I could do, but nothing came to mind. He came and sat back down next to me. I rested my head on his shoulder and he ran his fingers through my hair.

"It's not your fault Gee." I said. He didn't answer, but I did feel a few teardrops fall onto my hair. I just closed my eyes and let Gerard cry quietly above me. We both fell asleep, and when I woke up, Gerard had fallen down in his slumber, and so I'd ended up kind of draped over his stomach/hip bone. I sat up and looked out the window. It was pitch dark outside except for the half-moon and bright stars. Outside the nursery door it was pitch dark, it had to be pretty late at night. I walked out of the room, leaving Gerard where he was on the floor and walked downstairs. The clock on the microwave read 3:19 am. I yawned at the thought of how late...or early...it was, but shrugged it off and picked up the phone. I dialed the numbers I'd barely memorized and listened to the phone ring.

"Whoever this is needs to get a watch." said Frank's groggy voice after three rings.

"Frankie? It's Lucy." I said.

"Oh, hey Luc, what's up?" he asked, more alert now. "Is everything okay?"

"Um...no." I said. "Frank we lost the baby." I said.

"Oh shit..." he said. "I'm sorry Luc. How's Gerard?" he asked.

"Blaming himself." I said.

"Jeeze...okay. Wow." said Frank.

"We fell asleep around five. Gerard is still here. I'm gonna call the others, can you get here like now?" I asked.

"Absolutely." said Frank. "Should I call Liz?" he asked.  
"Yeah just get here with her ASAP." I said.

"Okay. Twenty minutes tops. Bye hun." he said.

"Bye." I hung up. I called Ray, Mikey, and Bob, and within a half hour we were all sitting in the living room as I explained what happened. I showed them the scar on my stomach and Mikey started to cry. "Mikey what is it?" I asked.

"I...I don't deal with death well okay?" he said, turning away. Liz, who was sitting closest to him, rubbed his back gently, earning a glare from Frank. Liz rolled her eyes at him before saying

"So where is Gerard anyway?"

"Um, when I last saw him he was asleep on the floor in the nursery." I said.

"I'm gonna go talk to him." said Frank, standing up and walking up the stairs.


	17. Chapter 16

**CHAPTER SIXTEEN**

**GERARD'S POV**

"Yo. Yo Gerard wake up. DUDE!" I awoke to Frank's voice, and was immedietly in pain from sleeping on the hard part of the floor.

"Huh? Frank?" I mumbled.

"Yeah. Gerard everybody's downstairs. Lucy told us about the baby. I'm sorry man." said Frank. It all came rushing back to me. The car crash, the scar on Lucy's stomach, the baby...

"What time is it?" I asked.

"Um, like close to four in the morning." said Frank.

"Then why the hell are you here?" I asked. I sat up, and rubbed my eyes.

"I told you, Lucy called us. We came to try and...cheer you up." said Frank.

"That's stupid." I said.

"I know." said Frank, staring at the ground. "But hey, wanna be the first to hear my big news?" he asked, looking at me, smiling. I raised an eyebrow at me.

"Sure..." I said, nervous at the maniac look in his eyes. "What's up Frank?" I asked.

"Okay. My sister got an internship at Eyeball records. You know, the company that did Thursday's record? And they're looking for new talent. They're willing to audition My Chemical Romance. They might sign us if we're good Gerard! We might get to cut a record!" he said excitedly. Some adrenaline did rise in my body, but it couldn't overtake the depression I'd fallen into over Lucy and the baby. I mean, a record deal was what we'd always wanted, but it just didn't seem to matter anymore.

"That's great Frank. Really. But four AM isn't exactly the time I want to talk about details." I said. Frank looked crestfallen, but nodded.

"You wanna come downstairs? We're going to make popcorn and watch movies. No one will care if you and Lucy get into PDAing..." his voice trailed off. I shook my head.

"Nah. I think I'm going to go up to Lucy's room and get some better sleep." I said, standing up with Frank. He nodded and turned to leave, but stopped, and pulled me into a tight hug.

"It's gonna be okay Gerard." he said. He let go of me and walked down the stairs. I walked father up into Lucy's tower, and collapsed on her bed. I lay there staring at the wall for maybe five minutes, and had almost drifted off to sleep, when I heard footsteps entering the room.

"Gerard?" It was Ray. "You awake?"

"Mhm." I mumbled. He sat down next to me.

"Dude...none of us wanna see you like this." he said.

"Like what?" I asked.

"Like how you're going to be once you're fully awake." he said. I moaned into the pillow.

"What? Do you all think I'm going to go all suicidal?" I asked.

"Basically." said Ray matter-of-factly.  
"Wow. Good to know my friends have so much confidence in me."

"It's not that we don't have confidence in you, it's that if anything will throw you over the edge, it's losing your kid." said Ray.

"Well there's not much I can do." I said.  
"Of course there is." said Ray.

"Oh is there? And what's that genius?" I asked.

"Isn't there anything you can do for yourself?" asked Ray.

"Huh?" I mumbled.

"You know, do something you want to do to take your mind of Lucy and the baby?"

"Um...and I want to do that...why?" I asked, taking my face out of the pillow to look at him.

"Because otherwise it's going to take you over completely." said Ray, matter-of-factly. I thought about it, and he was absolutely right. I knew that if I sat here and just let this stew inside of me it would just get to out of control.

"There's this art school..." I started. "I've always wanted to go to art school." I said.

"Do it!" said Ray excitedly. I sat up and smiled.

"You think Lucy would be okay with it?" I asked.

"I'm sure she's fine with anything you'd want to do." answered Ray. I nodded.  
"Thank you Raymond. You're a good friend." I said, laughing, knowing how much he hates being called Raymond. He rolled his eyes.

"So are you feeling better?" he asked.

"Much." I answered.

"Good. Then I am going downstairs before Frank and Mikey steal all the popcorn." he said, walking out. I fell asleep making plans to get to this school.


	18. Chapter 17

**CHAPTER SEVENTEEN**

**LUCY'S POV**

Three weeks later, I was sitting in my room listening to Morrissey, when my cell phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Lucy?" said Frank.

"Yeah Frankie what's up?" I asked. "Is something wrong?" I asked. I could hear screaming in the background. People screaming at Gerard with things like "are you crazy?" and "what were you thinking?"

"Um. Yeah something's very wrong. Can you get over here...like now? We're in Gerard and Mikey's basement."

"Um...sure. Give me a few minutes?" I asked.

"Yeah okay. Bye Luc." he said and hung up. What was that all about? I got up and switched my shorts for jeans, and threw a hoodie over my tank top. I pulled my hair into a small ponytail nub and ran downstairs. I jumped in my car and sped over to Gerard and Mikey's house. I could hear the screaming as I let myself in through the front door. I ran down the stairs to the basement.  
"What's going on?" I shouted. Everyone went quiet. Everyone was sitting down, looking furious, except Bob, who was standing in front of Gerard, shoulders arched, face red, breathing hard.

"Oh good." he said. "Your girlfriend's here to watch the world end too." he sat down.

"What's he talking about?" I asked, turning to the boys and Liz.

"Your boyfriend's abandoning us." spat Frank. I looked at Gerard.

"It was Ray who told me to do the art school thing!" said Gerard defensively.  
"DON'T LOOK AT ME! I DIDN'T TELL YOU TO MOVE ACROSS THE FUCKING COUNTRY!" shouted Ray.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP AND SOMEONE TELL ME WHAT THE FLYING FUCK IS GOING ON!" I shrieked. I was pissed. What was this shit about moving across the country? It was Gerard that spoke to explain.

"After we lost the baby...Ray convinced me to do something to get my mind off of things. I told him I'd been looking into an art school, he said go for it. I did. I got accepted to the school...it's in Utah." he stopped as I screamed.

"UTAH?!" I shrieked. "GERARD THAT'S...GOD THAT'S...oh..." I collapsed on the couch next to Mikey, who hugged me defensively. Gerard spoke again.  
"My old friend Bert, he lives with his band, Quinn, Brandon, and Jeph. I'm gonna stay with them." he said. I started to cry.

"How long are you gone for?" I asked.

"It's a four-year school." he whispered. I let out a huge sob.

"And what about me?" I asked. "What about us? What about the guys? What about the band?"

"Yeah Gerard what about the deal?" asked Frank.

"I don't know. It can wait." he said, chin trembling. "Excuse me." he said, storming up the stairs. I couldn't be there any more. I ran up the stairs after Gerard, but I let myself out the front door and drove away as fast as possible. When I got home I ran up the stairs and jumped on my bed, landing hard on my stomach. I cried into my pillow, but then had to sit straight up. My pillow still smelled like him. My whole bed smelled like him. Oh god. I ripped the sheets off my bed and threw them in my closet, opting instead to cry into my now bare mattress. I heard someone step into my room and I sat bolt upright.  
"You've got a lot of nerve coming here now." I said as Gerard stepped closer to me.  
"Lucy...please...I don't want to leave you like this." he said.

"Like what?" I asked. "Rejected? Abandoned? Pick a word Gerard! You're the artist! I'm sure you can make something nice!" I shrieked at him. He shrank back.

"Can't you understand that I need to do this for me?" he shouted, looking hurt. "I thought you'd be okay with this!"

"OKAY WITH THIS?!" I screamed. "YOU EXPECT ME TO BE OKAY WITH THE MAN I LOVE MOVING ACROSS THE COUNTRY FOR THE NEXT FOUR YEARS? Gerard I might never see you again! I'll be in college by the time you get back!" I said. I fell back and bounced against the mattress. He sat down next to me.  
"I'm sorry." he said. He grabbed one of my hands and stroked it with his thumb, whispering something i could barely understand in the softest of voices that I couldn't stay mad at. I didn't know how.

"You're doing it again." I said..

"Doing what?" he asked.

"That thing with your voice and your face that makes it impossible to be mad at you, no matter how bad you fuck things up." I said, smiling.

"Well I'm just loveable like that I guess." he said, ticking me. I giggled and squirmed like a four-year-old, and that only encouraged him, tickling my stomach, pinching my hips, and kissing the most sensitive spots on my neck. I let out a playful shriek.  
"Gee stop it!" I squealed. He stopped and just looked into my eyes. "I don't want you to go." I said sadly, tears filling my eyes again. His gaze turned sad as well, and he spoke softly.

"Well...I'm not leaving until tomorrow." he said.

"That's still not enough time." I whispered.

"It'll never be enough time." he said, kissing me softly. "But I'll be back before you know it."

"It's not before I know it." I whined. "It's four years. I'll be in college. What if I never see you again?" I asked. He looked down, thinking.

"Let's just...not talk about it. You're the only one who is even going to speak to me before I leave. Never seeing you again is the last thing I want to talk about." he said. I nodded and he kissed me again. This time, his hand wandered down the curves of my chest and to my hips.

"Gerard." I whispered.

"Lucy." he responded. I swallowed hard. More than anything I wanted him one last time before he left.

"This is the last time we're gonna see each other." I whispered. "And...why waste the time? Why-"  
"I agree." he said, cutting me off with a hard kiss. He pulled off my shirt and I started working at his belt buckle. I was probably crazy to do this condom-less AGAIN, but I didn't fucking care anymore. I just wanted all of him I could have, for this one last time. He was somehow able to unhook my bra one-handed, and my eyes shot open.

"Where'd you learn to do that?" I asked in a whisper, smiling a curios half-smile.

"I guess you just make me able to do things I'd never done before Luc." he said. Wow. We paused for a second, down to underwear and just looked at each other. "Wanna do this?" he asked, raising one eyebrow.

"I let you go this far, and you think there's the possibility that I'd say 'no get the hell off'?" I asked, eyebrow raised.

"Guess not." he said, smiling a crooked half-smile as I removed my own underwear. I don't know how long we were there for. An hour? Two? Three? Hell, for all we could have known, days could have passed and Gerard's plane could have been gone. Wouldn't that just be great? Never having him have to leave...I found myself glancing over Gerard's chest at my clock and seeing four PM. I plopped my head down on his sweaty chest that was still rising fast from his heavy breathing. I shut my eyes and listened as his heartbeat slowed back to normal. He ran his fingers through my hair and I slid my head up to rest instead in the crook of his neck. He lay his head over mine and I could feel the air from his nose going over my ear.

"I'm gonna miss you so much." I said. His muscles went limp as the memory that he's leaving in two days set back in.

"You're amazing you know that?" he said. I laughed.

"Is that because you love me or because I just let you fuck me?" I asked.

"Hmmm." he said, pretending to think. "Well come to think of it...it might be the sex!" he said sarcastically. I pretended to be insulted, and gave him a light punch to the stomach. "OUCH!" he said, trying to pout and smile at the same time. He wasn't very convincing. "That hurt Lucy." he said, giving me pathetic puppy dog eyes. I kissed him as an apology and he started working his way down my neck again. I let him go and looked at the clock again.

"Wow. You've been here like...all day." I said. He sat bolt upright.

"I have?" he asked. "What time is it?"

"Like five ten." I said. "Why?" I asked. He started getting up and getting dressed. He'd just pulled on his pants, searching out his t-shirt.  
"I have to go home and...I need to...p...I need to pa...I have to pack." he said finally. I looked down at my hands, crossed in my lap.

"Oh." I said. "When do you leave again?"

"Tomorrow morning. Ten AM." he said.

"Oh." I repeated. "Is everyone coming to see you off?" I asked.  
"So far, no one. Will you?" he asked, looking imploringly at me.

"Of course..." I said. He smiled as he pulled on his jacket. He leaned over the bed, on which I still sat and kissed me on the cheek. I grabbed his face and pulled it over my lips. I just wanted one last kiss. I'm sure he didn't understand, but it was my last. I wasn't going to the airport tomorrow. When Gerard left I pulled out my cell phone and called Ray.

"Hello?"  
"Ray it's Lucy." I said.

"Oh hey Luc...how are you?" he asked.

"I'm fine. In fact Gerard just left." I said.

"Oh." he said, voice more impatient. "And?"

"I want you guys to see him off at the airport tomorrow." I said.

"Lucy..." started Ray.

"Ray..." I mimicked.

"Why aren't you?" he asked.

"Because I can't handle that. I can't do it. I just can't be there when he goes. He thinks I'm the only one who will show up. He thinks you all hate him." I said.

"Nobody hates him, we're just pissed as hell at him." said Ray.

"Please just see him off Ray. Please." I said.

"Alright." he sighed. "But you owe us all big time." he added.

"Yes I do." I said. "Now will you call the others or should I?" I asked.

"I'll do it. Want us to call you when he leaves?" he asked.

"Yeah please." I said.

"Okay. Talk to you tomorrow Luc." he said.

"Bye." I hung up, and plopped my head down on my pillow, crying my eyes out. The next day I just lay in bed and watched the clock. Nine thirty, ten o clock, ten thirty, eleven, my cell phone rang. I answered it.  
"Hello?"

"Lucy?" came Mikey's voice.

"Hey. Did you guys go to the airport?" I asked.  
"Yeah." he said. "Everyone ended up coming out. He was happy we were all there, but he kept asking about you. We told him that your parents came home." he said.

"Okay thanks. So...is he..." I started.

"He's gone Lucy." said Mikey quietly. I broke down again, said a quick good bye, and hung up. Gerard was gone, and I might never see him again.


	19. Chapter 18

**CHAPTER 18**

**GERARD'S POV**

**SIX YEARS LATER**

I'm out of art school, I'm twenty three now, and I'm still in Utah. I'm still living with Bert, and I've been sitting in on some of his band rehearsals. I've become really good friends with his band mates too. There's Quinn, Jeph, and Brandon and they're all really nice. The reason that I'm still with them here in Utah, even two years after art school, is because I'd been developing a cartoon. I actually pitched it to Cartoon Network today...and they rejected it. Well I thought it was pretty cool, but they said it was too close to Aqua Teen Hunger Force. I opened the door to Bert's apartment and he was sitting at the counter, reading a newspaper and drinking a beer. I grabbed one from the fridge in silence.

"So how'd it go with the cartoon guys?" asked Bert without looking up.

"Rejected." I muttered. Burt put down the paper.

"Oh. Sorry dude that sucks." he said. "But if its any consolation I almost shit myself I thought it was so funny." he added, laughing a little. I wasn't in the mood for Bert's jokes, so I got rude.

"Honestly that's no consolation at all." I said walking into my room. I plopped down on my bed and flicked on the T.V. I guess you're wondering about me and Lucy then right? Well, there's nothing to wonder anymore. She didn't show up at the airport, she never called, whenever I called she wouldn't say much. Eventually I just stopped trying. I figured she didn't want anything to do with me. Of course I missed her, but I think one of those funky "fell out of love" things happened from the separation. I started changing the channels and finally settled on the news. I watched all the tragic stories and they just washed over me. Something about a man faking his taxes, something about an old lady wanting her missing son to come home, then something from New Jersey that caught my attention. The anchorwoman started to speak and I sat foreword on my bed.

"And today Belleville, New Jersey mourns the loss of one of their own when Lucy Dawson died in New York City last night around eleven thirty PM. Two men attacked her in an attempt to mug her, when she fought back one of the men stabbed her twice in the chest, and she bled out on the way to the hospital. Lucy's funeral will be held tomorrow for all friends and family wishing to attend." She went on to some other story and I just sat there. I went cold as stone. There was no way they could have been talking about MY Lucy Dawson could they? I picked up my cell phone and sent a text message to Frank. It read HOW IS LUCY DOING. I put my cell phone down waited a few minutes in silence, biting my nails. A few minutes later my cell phone beeped with a text from Frank. It said IS THAT A JOKE? I texted him back saying NO. WHAT'S THE MATTER? IS SHE OKAY? Another text from him read NO GERARD. SHE'S ANYTHING BUT OKAY. My heart must have stopped as I texted back WHAT DO YOU MEAN? Frank replied saying YOU DON'T KNOW DO YOU? I replied saying WHAT HAPPENED. Frank never replied to that. I ran back into the kitchen and stood there. Bert looked up.  
"What's up Gerard, you look like you've seen a ghost." he said. I swallowed hard and looked at him.

"I need a ride." I whispered. Bert didn't ask questions, he just got his keys and we walked to his car. I didn't take anything with me, I didn't have time. I just grabbed my wallet and made sure my credit cards were there.

"Where are we going Gerard?" asked Bert as he started the car.

"Nearest airport." was all I could make out. He gave me a weird look and looked like he was about to say something, but I silenced him. "JUST GO!" I shouted.

"Alright alright!" said Bert and sped off. When we got to their airport I ran to the front desk.

"Put me on your next flight to Jersey." I said. The attendant pressed some buttons on the keyboard.  
"We have a seat left on the flight that leaves in one hour." she said.  
"Great." I said, pulling out my credit card. She took it, swiped it, and handed me my tickets. I ran across security without a hitch and sat in the airport lounge until I heard the call for my flight. I ran onto the plane and settled in. I fell asleep after about twenty minutes, and woke up when we landed from the bumps of the runway. I sat straight up and looked around. We'd touched down in LaGuardia airport and people were walking off the plane. I pushed past people and ran out of the airport. I caught a bus to a hotel and checked in for two nights. I then checked online all the funeral homes in the area, and discovered that Lucy's funeral was open coffin, being held tomorrow at twelve noon, at the Greater Belleville Funeral Home. I wasted a few hours watching T.V. and sketching on the notepad at the room desk. When I looked up from the sketching the window was pitch dark and the clock read 11:20. I yawned and stood up to stretch. I sat down on the bed and stared out the window at the highway below. I fell back and lay across the bed and just fell asleep like that, feet still on the floor. I woke up around ten AM, back aching from the pain of sleeping in the position I had. I sat straight up and realized what time it was. I stared in the mirror and discovered that my reflection looked like fucking death warmed over. My hair was all over the place, and my eyeliner (yeah I wear eyeliner, got a problem?" was smudged. I went into the bathroom and did the best I could with my hair by combing it with my fingers. It didn't look to terrible, but was still due for a washing, so I jumped in the shower. I only spent about five minutes in there, and towel-dried my hair quickly once I'd gotten out, re-dressing in the same clothes. There, now my hair looked okay, and all the makeup was gone. I called information from my hotel room phone and asked for a cab company. The cab I'd ordered met me at the front of the hotel, and drove me to the Greater Belleville Funeral Home. I glanced at my watch. Eleven forty-five; perfect. People...schoolmates...family were already filing in, so I waited in the cab for a little while. At twelve, some ushers came to close the doors, so I stepped out of the cab and past the ushers. Some people were milling around a brown wooden coffin, all dressed in black, many crying. I hung back, but eventually couldn't take it. I walked up the coffin and stood near the top, near her face. My heart leapt into my throat. There lay Lucy...dead. Her eyelids were barely closed, and her face was totally caked in blush. I could see right through it to the pale bloodless skin below. She was dressed in a long lacy black dress and her hair, which was much longer than when I'd left her (about down to her chest) was curled lightly. My eyes stayed fixed on her face, and my brain kept saying turn away. But I couldn't, eventually my head jerked up, and while I intended to stare at the wall, my eyes fell on the girl standing on the other side of the coffin from me. She stood there, staring at me, moping away a few tears with her hand. It was Lexi Andreas. Her jaw dropped when she saw me.  
"What are you doing here?" she asked. I glared at her.

"I could ask you the same thing." I spat. "What are you doing at the funeral of the girl you hate and who hated you? Or did you just come to hit on me again?" I asked. She rolled her eyes.

"Don't flatter yourself sweetheart." she said. She held up her left hand and pointed to it. A ring with a huge diamond glared in the stained-glass sunlight at me. "See this?" she asked. "It's called a wedding ring. A commitment. Something you weren't able to give Lucy." she said. Her words pierced me like knives because she was absolutely right.

"You're Bryce's wife then I assume?" I asked. She nodded smugly.

"Ah." I said. "Well, congratulations." I added.  
"What were you thinking coming here?" she asked.  
"She was my girlfriend Lexi." I said.

"It's Alexia now." she spat. "I dropped Lexi after graduation." she added. "And yeah, she WAS your girlfriend, until you went away to Colorado or whatever." she said.

"Utah for your information." I said matter-of-factly. She raised her eyebrows in acknowledgement.

"You completely destroyed her when you left." said ALEXIA. I looked at her, confused. "She got really depressed. Didn't come to senior prom, didn't come to school, didn't graduate. Then again, it probably wouldn't have been very different if you'd stayed would it have been?" she asked, smirking. I gave her a dirty look and said

"I had no idea. She never called, never wanted to talk when I called her. I just..." I said.

"You just gave up." said Alexia. "That's what Lucy said when you left. That's what Lucy said whenever she had a single thought about you. That's what Lucy said on the phone with me when she died." she said, tears welling in her eyes again.

"What?" I asked. She took a deep breath.

"Lucy was talking to me on her cell phone, the night she died, as she walked through NYC. You came up. She reminded herself about how she thought you'd just given up on her. I heard her scream suddenly, I heard two men's voices. I heard the fucking knife hit her Gerard. I was as good as there." she said, chin trembling. I was at a loss for words. I walked around the coffin and hugged her.  
"I'm sorry." I said. "One question, what were you two talking about anyway? I thought you wanted nothing to do with her and us." I said. She looked at me.

"Wow you really stopped talking to her fast didn't you?" She asked. "We became friends again about a month after you left. And Gerard...if you want brutal honesty...she dumped your friends and came back to me and her old girls. Almost like you were the only thing holding her there." she said. My jaw dropped. I shook my head furiously.

"That's a lie." I said. "That's a complete and total lie." I said again.

"It's not, Gerard." said Alexia solomly. "I'm sorry but it's not." she whispered. I took another lingering look at Lucy and then ran like hell out of the funeral home. It had started to rain, but I kept running. I needed to get to Frank's house. I needed to talk to him about that Eyeball Deal.

THE END


End file.
